What kind of woman are you looking for in papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan)?
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I’m tired of being expected to fit the image of a woman who’s convenient for him. Is that just what being a mistress is like? Am I not allowed to complain?
There’s been too much self-centered behavior from the papa (male supporter) side, and I’m exhausted.
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂20s👑Member of another dating club
Sometimes
I fell for women who wanted the kind of man who was convenient for them. Isn’t that what a papa is supposed to be? Apparently, they need someone they can complain to.
Sometimes I’m even captivated by the woman’s self-centered behavior.
I guess I’ve got a bit of a masochistic streak…
I’m getting on in years, too, so every bit of a woman’s joy, anger, sorrow, and happiness just gets to me…
> Mack
I feel that an answer should be provocative enough to make one side bristle a little, so the fact that you reacted that way was actually a compliment.
It’s only when you get opinions from both opposing sides that…
That said, reverse offers are wonderful too.
By the way, I never get annoyed by Makeo’s answers. If anything, I tend to agree with him more often. So, if his goal is to attract “good women,” I sometimes think he’d be better off presenting himself as a generous, high-allowance man who doesn’t insult anyone. I think all the men here share the hope that good women will join for the sake of those who come later.
Also, I’m so satisfied that I’d be perfectly happy to quit at any time—which is an incredibly high compliment to Uniba. So I can give answers like, “Go ahead and quit whenever you want,” or “It’s totally fine if I’m removed as an answerer,” as well as answers from the perspective of a calm bystander. I hope that means my range of answers will expand.
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The so-called “Showa-era mistress” arrangement was a relationship that worked in the man’s favor.
But that was only possible because he paid a commensurate price.
I don’t believe you can tie a woman down like a Showa-era mistress with the kind of allowance typically offered in papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan).
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I’m an old man, and I’m hardly a high-level guy myself, so I don’t demand exceptional looks, education, or anything like that from the women I date.
What I’m looking for is someone who discusses how we’ll conduct the relationship several times at the beginning, agrees to the arrangement, and keeps her promises. In her everyday life, she should also be able to live with an awareness of my presence.
As long as she can do that, I’ll never be the one to end the relationship.
Despite the age gap, the women I date are quite responsible. While one of them was registered with a dating club, she would ask, “I got an offer—would it be okay if I met him?” She also left the club fairly soon, even though we never made any specific promises about that.
She doesn’t seem to have—or want—a boyfriend, either. So far, I haven’t had to worry about sexually transmitted infections, and I’ve been enjoying this arrangement.
P.S.
To Makeotoko:
> I won’t deny that women are usually the ones being disadvantaged, but when a woman meets a good papa, I’d like her to make a once-in-a-lifetime effort to get him truly hooked. It’s such a waste otherwise.
I agree. That passage is absolutely brilliant.
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I’m looking for a woman who’s easy to be with—not just a typical affair, but a compensated relationship.
I only date women I genuinely feel are right for me, but I do think I’m fairly willing to accommodate my partner’s wishes.
Aya, as always, really gets it.
Exactly this:
“She accepts my desires, makes me feel like a man again, may complain from time to time, but is ultimately cute, sexy, and beautiful; honest yet independent; fun to talk to, but not too foolish…”
That’s precisely what I mean.
However, I can’t accommodate unreasonable demands about time, so I couldn’t date someone who says things like:
“Can you come out right now?”
or
“Why don’t you stay over tonight and just go to work from here tomorrow?”
I want a relationship that feels comfortable for both of us—with reasonable requests and someone whose requests I can accept.
The other day, there was a questioner who said I could only say that because I’m fortunate. But that’s one line I’m not willing to compromise on.
Marika
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I may not look it, but I’m actually pretty accommodating and open-minded.
I do some of the kinky things I write about in my columns, but I place a lot of importance on communication. I’ll make suggestions, but I won’t do anything she dislikes or seems to be forcing herself to tolerate.
Even if she isn’t into that kind of thing, if she’s a girl I feel is worth meeting, I’ll just take her on a normal date and have ordinary H.
On the other hand, there really are girls who say, “I want to go to a swingers’ club. I really want to be ravished.” I sometimes get comments like that through reverse offers. In those cases, I adapt to her and guide her through that world.
Today at lunchtime, I had my first meeting—and H—with the girl from:
https://universe-club.jp/help/questions/view/13495
She was a really lovely girl. Of course I’ll see her again and continue the arrangement.
I also received a reverse offer from the girl in:
https://universe-club.jp/help/questions/view/13680
She lives far away, but I’m planning to meet her and cover her travel expenses. I understand her circumstances, so I won’t tell her to decide after the second meeting. I’ll continue treating her to important dinner dates as many times as it takes for her feelings to settle. I’ll never pressure her.
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That’s what I wanted to write, so I posted this answer. Paper Airplane, how about that—are you impressed? lol
Actually, thanks for playing the punching-bag role for me, lol. In the end, maybe you gave me a pretty good assist.
I’m not jealous at all of those 84 likes. All I want is just one reverse offer from the questioner I’ve locked onto.
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Many men are looking for a woman who suits their needs.
Someone who will indulge their desires, make them feel masculine again, and may complain sometimes but is ultimately cute, sexy, and beautiful; obedient yet independent; fun to talk to, but not too foolish… The list could go on forever.
You only need to date a papa who makes you want to fulfill those ideals for him.
There’s no need to force yourself to be with someone who makes you uncomfortable.
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This isn’t a hostess club or cabaret, so he’s not a customer—you’re on equal footing. If you don’t like something, you can speak up, and you always have the option of ending things.
Of course, since you’re receiving money from your papa, you do need to phrase things tactfully and consider his personality.
If you’re tired, why not take a short break or leave the site for a while, then come back if you need the money again?
Not all male members are selfish. I can’t even tell you how much I adjust to the other person（笑）
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Like Kazu, I’m looking for someone who suits my needs, while also wanting the arrangement to work well for them too.
I consider myself quite self-centered. I don’t know whether what I see as gentlemanly behavior would be appreciated by every woman, and I do have certain things I absolutely won’t compromise on. So I don’t think I’m everyone’s ideal partner—and thinking that I could be would probably be the height of self-centeredness.
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I’m not sure how other people’s preferences are relevant here, but I think you should simply look for the kind of person you want.
And if you’re tired of it, I think it’s perfectly fine to stop.
Basically, it’s much like looking for a romantic partner.
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I’m looking for someone who fits conveniently into my life.
At the same time, I intend to be someone who’s convenient for the woman as well. Otherwise, the relationship won’t work. If she can’t even voice her complaints, I wouldn’t call myself a convenient partner, so I welcome fair criticism from her.
Since this is a relationship between two people, I think it’s best to end things promptly before you become exhausted.
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I don’t really have an ideal type. I’ve never settled on one particular ideal.
I’m basically like a male escort, so I cater completely to the woman. I’m extremely other-centered. Seeing a woman enjoying herself is my greatest pleasure, so my own release is, at most, my third priority.
Since I’m like a male escort, I’m obsessively particular about looking clean and well-groomed. My hairstyle, fashion, physique—everything. Talking is my biggest strength, so I keep her laughing throughout the date.
And my allowance starts at ¥10,000.
Even after putting in that much effort, though, I’ve only met two women who made the same kind of effort.
My former ace and my current ace.
I don’t deny that women are usually the ones being mistreated, but when a woman meets a good papa, I wish she’d make a wholehearted effort to get him hooked, too. It’s honestly such a waste.
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