Recently, I’ve received several offers at the same time and have been coordinating dates. I’ve been communicating with the club to arrange the schedules of several people simultaneously. I’m not sure whether each gentleman has a different staff member assigned to him, but even when the details should have been clear from reading our previous messages, I was contacted again and had to repeat everything I’d already explained. Is this because the staff handling the scheduling without properly reading or understanding the details are new? Or should I just accept that this kind of thing happens sometimes? I’m also worried that this could affect the impression the gentlemen form of me while arranging a schedule after making an offer. For example, if I gave the club several possible dates but they only passed along one, and then I have to contact the club again to explain that the other dates work too, followed by the club telling the gentleman, “That date works as well,” I’m concerned he might get a bad impression and think I’m someone who can’t coordinate her schedule properly.

This is Murase from CS5. I’m very sorry for making you uncomfortable! Women who are so popular that they receive multiple offers at once are extremely rare, so I may have panicked a little. I’ve read your question, but since I haven’t actually seen the messages exchanged, I’d rather not speculate and answer here. It’s no surprise that she’s popular—she’s clearly a wonderful woman who cares about the impression she makes even before the date. I’ll be more careful as well, so if anything similar happens again, I’d really appreciate it if you could point it out to me directly on LINE.

Even if it’s the same thing several times, there’s nothing wrong with replying. It helps prevent mistakes and omissions. Instead of taking the time to write an irritated message that makes the reader feel bad, I think the questioner should simply make sure they fully understand the offer recipient’s schedule and preferences before replying. Akari

> Are the staff members who adjust schedules without understanding the situation new? “New” generally means someone who has been with the company for less than a year, I believe. However, the new graduates who joined this spring were not assigned to the scheduling department. Also, since the people working on-site are basically all new graduates, I don’t think anyone who joined within the past year was assigned there either. So, if that’s the case, the staff members adjusting schedules without understanding the situation aren’t actually newcomers. > I’m not sure whether each male member has their own staff representative, Black-class male members do have assigned staff, but those staff members don’t handle the scheduling. So the fact that someone different replies each time isn’t the fault of the assigned representative. I think the problem lies in Universe’s scheduling system itself. After all, when different people reply, each person has to read through the previous correspondence. Having multiple staff members repeatedly go over the same exchanges is extremely inefficient. Because of that, I imagine some staff members eventually get tired of it and reply without reading the previous messages. This isn’t something that just started recently. They’ve been doing things this way for years, and it has continued without being improved. Scheduling can sometimes take several days. If the date changes, it’s understandable that the original staff member may be off and someone else responds. But having a different staff member reply on the very same day makes me think, “What on earth are they thinking?” So, regarding this: > Or should I just accept that these things can’t be helped? I think it’s best to assume that this is simply how things are. > For example, I gave the club several possible dates, but they only conveyed one of them to the male member. Then I had to contact the club again to explain the situation, and the club later told the male member that the other date worked as well. I was worried that this might make me look bad, as if I were someone who couldn’t manage her schedule. Male members are aware of this flaw—the lack of coordination between staff members—so you don’t need to worry（笑). The person the male member is communicating with is the staff, not you. Very few men will think that a woman is unable to manage her schedule because of this. However, if a woman genuinely is difficult to schedule, the staff may tell the male member something like, “We’re having trouble getting a response from her.” In that case, he may think she’s the type who can’t coordinate her schedule well. So it’s still better to reply promptly. In any case, the club only handles the scheduling for the first meeting. If you continue seeing the same man afterward, the more often you meet, the more he’ll evaluate you directly, so I don’t think you need to worry at all.

You’re not showing any appreciation for the staff who are going out of their way to help you—you’re only worried about whether the man you’re meeting might think less of you. Women often say they dislike it when a man acts condescending toward restaurant staff. Do you realize that you’re treating the staff the same way? That’s exactly how you come across in this question. Even if a staff member makes a minor mistake, please try to be understanding. They’re only human, and these things happen.

Since people are involved, it’s inherently analog, so mismatches and mistakes are bound to happen. If they digitized the whole process and switched entirely to Letter Date, I think they could even eliminate the back-and-forth communication.

Since the schedule is coordinated manually, I suppose it can’t really be helped. From the man’s perspective, it’s not as though one particular staff member continues to follow up with you; instead, whichever staff member is available responds each time. So I do think they tend not to read through older messages. The communication window is fairly limited, so you need to work within those boundaries and make things go smoothly. It’s easy to start thinking, “They should obviously do this for me,” but it’s more constructive to think, “Thank you for your support. I’ll manage the parts that are lacking.” It’s natural to lean toward the former, so it helps to consciously aim for the latter. With that mindset, I think things can continue smoothly even after you meet your partner. Taro

> I’m not sure whether each male client has a designated staff member, but— When it comes to setting up a date, there isn’t one. Multiple staff members may take turns contacting you about a single arrangement. (Some people do have a regular staff member they usually speak with.) > Even though they should have understood if they had read our earlier conversation, they contacted me again. Different staff members handle each arrangement, and as mentioned above, several staff members may be involved. So I think it’s better not to expect them to read through your previous conversations. > Could the staff members who don’t read the details carefully and adjust schedules without fully understanding the situation be new employees? So, they aren’t necessarily new. > Or should I just accept that these things can’t be helped?? Rather than thinking it’s unavoidable, I think you should understand that it’s presumptuous to expect them to spend that much time and effort on your particular arrangement. > I’m worried this might make me look bad—as if I’m someone who can’t coordinate her schedule. From my perspective, you come across terribly if you’re unable to consider the other person’s situation.

I’m not entirely sure how the club handles LINE messages, but I believe offer notifications come from the male staff member at the branch who handles each gentleman. I had a different staff member contact me each time. I never received several offers on the same day—usually they came on consecutive days—so communication went relatively smoothly. I’m not sure whether I should say this here, but offers are only possible because of the men, and successful date arrangements also depend on the staff’s efforts. So even when communication with the staff isn’t going smoothly, I think making a conscious effort to remain polite will ultimately reflect positively on your evaluation as well.