Sorry, I’m the one who asked the previous question. I’ve been with over 30 people and do it two or three times a week—am I really inexperienced?
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I’ve met papa-katsu partners around 100 times, and probably another 500–600 times with boyfriends and friends with benefits. Exactly how many times do you have to do it before people say, “You can orgasm from penetration—you’re really experienced”? Does everyone else do it even more often?
As for oral, I think I’m pretty good—I’ve been told things like, “Have you ever worked in the sex industry?” and “You’re the best I’ve ever had.”
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂Not stated👑Universe female member
I’d say he probably has plenty of experience and has done it many times.
But reaching climax isn’t just about the number of times or his experience—it also depends on whether the questioner’s mind is in the right place and wants to climax, so it’s a difficult one to judge.
I think it comes down to technique, where he makes contact, the sense of fit, and your mental state.
To continue from my answer to your previous question: if you’re really good at giving oral, and you think the thrusting will go on too long to endure, you could have him pull out, remove the condom, bring him to climax orally, and finish with a “clean-up” blowjob. There are probably papas who’d be very happy with that.
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> Is it a lack of experience?
By the numbers, I don’t think you’re lacking experience. But if you’re asking why your partner has trouble reaching climax, it’s natural to wonder whether you might still be inexperienced.
And if you really do have that much experience, then from here on, it comes down to honing your skills.
Simply going through experiences on autopilot won’t get you any further.
It seems important to experiment in real situations each time—figuring out what makes your partner feel good, what helps them finish sooner, and so on.
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There’s only been one person I’ve ever been with where I almost climaxed just from penetration. It felt incredible even without moving.
We parted ways because he was getting married, but he told me that I felt so good that he wanted to keep seeing me even after the wedding. I said goodbye because I didn’t want to be the cause of a family breaking apart… but I’ve never met anyone with a penis better than his, and now I regret it.
I’ve heard that whether or not you can climax from penetration depends on the position of the clitoris. Is that really true?
Come to think of it, I’ve heard that cosmetic surgery can reposition or enlarge the clitoris.
So when people say someone is “experienced,” they mean it in a negative way.
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You’ve probably been with a lot of men who weren’t very skilled.
Thinking that you’re simply incapable of orgasming from penetration is just an assumption.
You haven’t met a skilled man yet, so please don’t talk as if you know everything.
The woman I slept with recently was in her late twenties and had a fair amount of experience, but she orgasmed so many times during foreplay that her hands started trembling. She said that had never happened to her before.
She was also very tight and felt amazing while we were having sex.
For now, I’d suggest that you look for a man who can finish in three to five minutes.
If it were me, and a woman asked whether she could orgasm, I’d simply think that there wouldn’t be a next time with her.
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There seems to be one misconception here: the number of sexual partners you’ve had isn’t proportional to your sexual experience.
Even if you’ve had relatively few partners, you can still gain plenty of experience by being with a good partner for a long time and having sex many times. I’ve probably been with fewer people than you have, but thanks to my boyfriend, I learned how to orgasm from penetration.
Having lots of clumsy, loveless sex may not make you better at it—in fact, it could even make your sensitivity worse. Especially with papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), having more partners doesn’t necessarily mean it’s better. I hope you’re able to enjoy a wonderful sex life.
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I’ve had far fewer partners and experiences than you, but… three minutes? Isn’t that way too short?! Does it even feel good?
Thirty minutes sounds long to me, but if I’m enjoying myself too, I’m willing to go a little longer. Honestly, I’d appreciate it! I don’t think I’ve ever climaxed either, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t pleasurable…
I wonder if everyone compliments the blowjob. No one’s going to say, “You’re bad at this,” right? Even with my limited experience, I don’t think I’m particularly good, but I’ve been asked things like, “Where did you learn to do that?” and “What was your ex-boyfriend like?”
I appreciate how good they are at giving compliments—it makes me want to try even harder!
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I’m not particularly experienced or skilled myself, so I can’t say for sure, but in terms of numbers, I’d say the questioner has had plenty of experience.
I don’t know what’s considered average, but compared with you, the woman I’m currently seeing probably hasn’t had nearly as much experience—or really, not even close—from what she’s told me so far. (I haven’t asked for an exact number.)
Even so, maybe it’s more about feelings than skill. I’m not sure if it happens every time, but I think she does finish that way with me.
Well, even if she’s only pretending, I’m satisfied, so I figure it’s all good.（笑）
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Having lots of sex with partners who are inexperienced and don’t care about you won’t necessarily help.
That said, if it becomes painful after just three minutes, it may be hard to improve. Rather than “getting better,” it might be more about gradually becoming accustomed to it and discovering what feels good.
I wouldn’t particularly recommend older men who claim to be great at sex, either. For now, finding a boyfriend who cares about you and is willing to take things slowly and spend time together would probably be best.
I hope you find someone wonderful.
Marika
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Your age makes a big difference too.
Once you’re around 30, I think both missionary and cowgirl can become pleasurable.
Also, it’s not about how many partners you’ve had—it’s about the quality of the experience.
It depends on the man and on how the woman feels, so unless you can let go of those preconceptions, things probably won’t work out the way you hope.
If you can’t shake those fixed ideas, it could take you 10 years—or even a lifetime. On the other hand, depending on the man, you might thaw out after just three or four times, or over the course of one or two years.
If you send me a reverse offer, I’d be happy to assess you anytime—whether you’re ready to thaw out, so to speak.
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In my experience, pain during penetration may be due to a lack of experience…
I don’t know how many partners everyone else has had, but my number is quite a bit higher than the questioner’s (>_<)
Sorry—I wonder if it might have more to do with age than the number of partners after all!
Or perhaps it’s just your individual physiology?
When penetration was painful, I used to prepare some gel in the bathroom beforehand.
What did I do when it hurt…? I’ll add more if I remember! (>_<)
**Update**
The gel I meant was Wet Trust!
From your earlier question, it sounded like you said you “like sex,” so it would be a shame if only penetration was painful.
I think it would be best if you could both get used to it and enjoy it, so for now, try using Wet Trust (๑>◡<๑)
And I’m sorry—I truly didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. It seems technique may matter too, so I apologize for saying something insensitive. I’m sorry. I’ll be more careful with my answers.
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