I’m terrified of getting older since joining this site. It really puts me off thinking that even the papas I’m close to are probably offering to younger women than me.
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Men judge women by their age, and if you’re not young, you have no value.
I read that there are things you can enjoy more once you’re older, but what exactly are they?
Isn’t that something only men can say?
There’s nothing good about women getting older...
I spend a lot of money on beauty treatments.
I’m in my 20s, but I’ve already had thread lifts many times.
How can you proudly say you’re in your 40s?
I’m Dai, a male member.
Personally, I think it’s a little sad to feel that the only thing worth spending money on is beauty.
If you broaden your horizons beyond beauty, you may find some good things about getting older.
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Because I was so cute in my twenties that I had no need for cosmetic surgery.
Just kidding—but I actually like myself more now than I did in my twenties.
Marika
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There are, of course, answers like, “No, that’s not it (lol)…”
Maybe it’s because I have my own career, position, and sense of self, so I’m not judged solely by my age.
Also, I’m fortunate to interact with people who don’t simply look at my age and call me an old lady.
As I grow older through all kinds of effort, hardship, and gratitude, the things and people I love only keep increasing.
Akari
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I’m Flag Maker, a column writer.
That’s because you become able to judge things based on your own values, rather than measuring yourself by someone else’s standards.
Women in their 40s are invincible. It’s their strongest decade. They’re full of energy and vitality, and they stop letting other people’s values dictate their lives.
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I’m in Seattle.
The person I’ve been seeing the longest is around 30, actually. I’ve also been quietly seeing someone in her 30s outside the club for eight years. If she’d been around 20 when we started, I’d have been arrested by now.
In terms of looks, 20 is definitely the most attractive age, but I feel a little self-conscious standing next to someone that young. Wherever we go, people assume we’re parent and child, so I worry that being too familiar might come off as creepy.
Once they’re in their 30s or older, though, they’re old enough that remarriage would be perfectly plausible, so I feel more comfortable acting like a normal married couple or dating couple. From the outside, people might still think we’re parent and child, though.
Also, the older I get, the more detached I become. I have fewer worries and fewer things that scare me.
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
It’s a misconception that men judge women by age, and it’s also a misconception that you have no value unless you’re young. More accurately, some men are looking for younger partners.
For example, I’m not attracted to women who say immature things like you do. Along the same lines, there are men who won’t make an offer unless a woman is in her 40s or older.
Regardless of gender, there are ways to enjoy life by making the most of your experience as you get older.
I think I can openly say I’m in my 40s because I’m convinced that getting older isn’t necessarily a bad thing.
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I’m Shingo Lee, a columnist.
I’m scared of getting older too.
What scares me most right now isn’t becoming poor—it’s aging.
The questioner has it wrong. There are three genders: “young men,” “young women,” and “people over 40.”
Once you’re over 40, you’re neither a man nor a woman. When you turn 40, you’re simply 40—and that’s why you can call yourself 40. Because you’re no longer a man or a woman...
At that point, you have no choice but to enjoy things beyond being male or female. Raising children, appreciating plants and flowers, kneading bread, customizing motorcycles, doing handicrafts...
I think that’s how you cultivate the rings of your life as a person. If you spend your whole life focused only on “being a man, being a woman, and sex,” it gets boring. So when you grow old, I think you just have to enjoy that stage of life for what it is.
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