I accept it with both hands and politely say, “Thank you,” but is that not enough? Do they secretly think I’m not grateful enough? (Could that be why things don’t continue very often?)
Should I jump up and say, “Yay!”? Papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) is a nerve-racking situation for me, so I can’t really get that excited…
I’m a male member—and a total pushover.
When I was dating a model I met in real life rather than through a club, I often gave her spending money.
She would smile from ear to ear and say, “Thank you ♡” so happily that I enjoyed seeing her reaction and ended up tipping her like a livestreamer.
Even when I treated her to a meal or a drink, she’d look me in the eye, smile, and say, “Thank you ♡” It was incredibly fun and made me feel great.
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I’m Dai, a male member.
No one has ever said anything to me beyond “Thank you.”
I think many men prefer to keep the exchange of money low-key.
If someone said “Yay!” every time, I might actually wonder if they were making fun of me.
The reason things don’t continue lies elsewhere.
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I’m Taro, a male member.
In my case, most women don’t react very much. They’ll quietly say something like, “Oh, thanks,” or “Thank you,” and give a small bow… I think the reason I’ve continued seeing some of them for so long is that, although money is part of the arrangement, they’re the type who meet me because of who I am—not because of the money. So, conversely, I feel a little uncomfortable when someone has a big reaction.
Accepting the allowance with both hands and politely saying “Thank you” is 100% correct in terms of etiquette, but I don’t like it. I once had someone I saw for a long time who did that. I understood that she was probably just trying to be polite, but I still didn’t like it. In those moments, I would become completely numb and let everything wash over me. I thought, “So this is what it means to empty your mind completely.”
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I’m Aya, a female member.
When I received my allowance in cash, I sincerely expressed my gratitude by saying, “Thank you so much for this much (>_<). Are you really sure it’s okay…? I’m sorry… I’ll put it to good use…!!” Even with a monthly arrangement paid by bank transfer, I send a thank-you message as soon as I confirm the payment.
There’s no need to get nervous about papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan). If salespeople got nervous every time they made a sales pitch, they wouldn’t get good results, right? It’s the same idea: just have a normal conversation with the other person and pick up on their needs along the way. If you understand what they want and can give it to them, the relationship will continue. Good luck!
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I’m Flag Maker, a columnist.
It might sound a little like something an experienced pro would do, but how about giving him a light hug and saying, “Thank you♡”?
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I’m Osaka, a male member.
I don’t think that’s the reason things can’t continue. I actually found myself thinking, “That makes sense,” when I read the question itself.
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