I’ve only been given a man’s full real name or business card a handful of times.

I’m Kazu, a male member. In the business world, if someone offers you their business card, it’s only polite to hand over yours in return. In the same way, if I tell a woman my real name or give her my business card, she may feel that she has to do the same. I don’t want to put someone I barely know in that position, so I choose not to share that information. I hope you can understand that this is one way of thinking about it.

I’m Aya, a female member. It does seem a little suspicious, doesn’t it? But with people like that, we have no choice but to keep seeing them without revealing too much personal information ourselves. They’re probably the type who absolutely doesn’t want anyone else to find out. They may not be able to build deep relationships with women, but I think they’re satisfied because they still get as much happiness as they can.

I’m Dai, a male member. I think the only reason someone can hand over their business card is because there’s no problem if their occupation becomes known. That’s not the case for me, so I don’t hand out my business card, and I can’t give specific details about my job either. Do you really think it’s possible to trust someone you’ve only just met? On the other hand, I can tell them my real name, since it’s extremely common. Women wouldn’t want to share their names either if they could be identified right away, unless they felt they could trust the person.

The person who stalked me gave me his business card on the very first day, told me he worked for a respectable organization, and even shared his home address. That may not mean much, but just because someone tells you their real name or gives you a business card doesn’t mean they’re trustworthy—or that they trust you. Marika

Maezawa from the President’s Office here, answering as well. First, just to avoid any misunderstanding: becoming an answerer does not mean I’ll connect you with other answerers. I did make that mistake once before, but I won’t do it again. This time, Makeo wrote that he exchanged business cards with Mack, but Mack simply made light use of a loophole. I believe he had one of the ace women he’s seeing make a reverse offer to Makeo, and then contacted him through her. Incidentally, even though Makeo had said he wouldn’t accept reverse offers, he apparently said, “I’ll accept one if it’s from Mack.” I thought, “What is that supposed to mean? Are you kidding?” but making a reverse offer and accepting one isn’t actually wrong. It was simply a slightly modified version of what Universe normally does, so it wasn’t really my place to say anything. I’m mentioning this just in case anyone gets the idea that becoming a Q&A answerer means you’ll become friends with the other answerers. Now, regarding the actual question: Many women also date men using only their club names, and the stance of dating clubs is that it’s perfectly fine for both parties to use their club names. So the fact that he hasn’t told you his real name doesn’t necessarily mean he doesn’t trust you. I think it simply depends on the man’s personal stance. Some men may proactively tell you their real name first, thinking that they should take the initiative if they want the other person to trust them, but I don’t think most men go that far. Some men may not even know that there are men who give out their real names. I don’t think you need to worry too much about this. It may be best to see it as simply being that man’s personal preference. Besides, business cards can be made very easily, so you don’t know whether the name on one is actually his real name. Though, normally, I’d assume a man would give you a business card with his real name on it.

I’m a male member—and definitely not one of the winners. I’m short, and today I exchanged business cards while looking up at Mack, a tall, slender papa (a male supporter) from my area. But that was only because we’d interacted through this anonymous Q&A box and built up a certain level of mutual trust. Normally, I wouldn’t give my business card to someone I’d merely met online, including through a dating club. Of course, I don’t give it to my dating partners either. I tell the women I see my real first name, but I rarely give them my full name. The only one I’ve told everything to—including my full name and home address—is my ace girl.

I’m Fuu, a column writer. To the person asking: would you give your papa (a male supporter) your workplace or home address? Even if he seems like a good person now, what would you do if he changed completely and started acting like a stalker after you tried to end things? I don’t think it’s a good idea to share too much personal information. Since this is an independent relationship, risk management is up to each person’s judgment—but please be careful so you don’t end up regretting it.

They’ll probably give it to you when they feel ready to. I tend to come across as rather reserved at first, so everyone I’ve met has given it to me either during the meal or while we were traveling somewhere. Everyone is different, and since it depends on the other person, I think all you can do is wait for the right moment. Akari