I have a few women I’m seeing on an ongoing basis, but none of them ever suggest dates first. I assumed they might not be that interested in me, but whenever I reach out to arrange a meeting, they say, “I’m happy you invited me,” and make an effort to work out a date.
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Is it not that common for women to suggest a day to meet themselves?
I’m Taro, a male member.
I don’t think you need to worry about it. Some people reach out on their own, while others just wait. Some may even initiate things at first, but stop doing so as the relationship gets longer—and then get upset and say you’re being cold if you don’t contact them either. Everyone has different communication styles, and I don’t think they necessarily correlate with whether they like you or not.
As for me, lately I’m almost always the one who reaches out first. I do have my own way of gauging whether someone likes me, though.
Anyway, I really don’t think you need to worry about it.
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I’m Aya, a female member.
It’s possible she doesn’t like you that much—but that’s not the case, right?
If so, I think women don’t view their relationship with a papa (a male supporter) as something as casual as dating, so it can be difficult for them to casually say something like, “When should we meet again?”
That said, if a papa (a male supporter) tells her, “I wish you’d reach out more casually and let me know when you’d like to meet again,” she might find it a little off-putting. So for now, all you can do is gradually grow closer as things are. Good luck.
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I’m male member Date◎Yume.
Since the start of our relationship, I’ve always said we’d meet every other week, so these days she contacts me with the specific dates.
When you meet, discuss the general plan for your next date, then say, “Let me know when it’s convenient for you.” I think she’ll get in touch.
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I’m Kazu, a male member.
Some people feel that it’s too pushy for a woman to take the initiative in setting up the next date. But even women who are like that may start asking, “How about this day?” once you’ve gotten to know each other better.
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Maezawa from the CEO’s office here.
Some women overthink things, so saying they want to meet can feel almost the same as saying they want money. They may worry about being seen as money-minded, which makes it hard for them to say they’d like to meet even when they do.
I think you should just message her and say you’d like to meet, without worrying about that—but apparently some people find it difficult.
Now that you know she’s that kind of person, I think you should take the initiative and invite her.
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Are you all socially awkward—men and women alike?
Wouldn’t it solve everything if you simply said, “Let me know when you’re free,” or “Should I reach out to you?”
Rather than worrying about what’s generally accepted, shouldn’t you focus on how the other person feels?
—Marika
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