The club arranges the first date, but after that, which person usually does the asking?
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I had assumed that the woman simply coordinates her schedule when the man invites her, but I’ve seen several people here say that the woman should be the one to ask, so now I’m curious.
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂Teens👑Universe female member
Since I’m seeing multiple people, coordinating schedules can get complicated, so I reach out and arrange everything myself.
Usually, at the end of a date, we tentatively set the next one. Then I coordinate with everyone else and contact them once the schedule is finalized.
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If I want to see someone again after the first meeting, I’ll reach out, and sometimes they’ll contact me first. If I don’t want to meet again, I simply won’t reach out—and if they contact me, I’ll politely decline. That’s the natural flow of things.
After that, I’m usually the one who gets in touch. The reason is simply that I’m selfishly trying to set the schedule myself.
That said, some women I haven’t seen in a while do make a point of contacting me every now and then so I won’t forget them. It often makes me think, “Maybe I should see her again,” so I guess their strategy is working. Haha.
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It just seems like popular women are more often contacted by men, while women are more likely to reach out to a good papa.
Once you get close, you’ll naturally start saying things like, “Let’s go here next time,” during your date, and the next one will fall into place.
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In my case, both happen, but lately I’ve been waiting for the women to reach out more often.
When a woman contacts me first, she tends to be more motivated.
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I have quite a few monthly arrangements, but unless a girl is a particular favorite of mine, I won’t meet her unless she invites me.
There’s probably only one monthly partner I actually take the initiative to invite—the girl who ranks third in my lineup.
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I don’t think we collected data on which person usually initiates after the second meeting, but it seems fine to say that whoever wants to meet should make the invitation.
If being turned down would be too emotionally difficult, it’s perfectly okay to wait for the other person to reach out. But if you think things would go more smoothly by taking the initiative, then you should invite them yourself.
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It varies from person to person, but I assume a woman will contact me if she’s interested, so I always wait for her to reach out first.
So when it comes to a second meeting, the woman is usually the one who invites me—almost 100% of the time, actually. Some women even contact me months or a year after our first meeting, presumably after seeing other men or waiting to see what offers came in.
As the relationship continues, different patterns naturally emerge. Before parting ways, she might suggest the next meeting like a dentist scheduling your next appointment. She may contact me toward the end of the month when she wants some spending money, or while we’re meeting or messaging on LINE, one of us might casually suggest going somewhere together next time. And when I’m feeling particularly tempted, I might ask her when she’s available.
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