Tips Jul 12, 2025 10:06

The club arranges the first date, but after that, which person usually does the asking?

This content is machine-translated.
I had assumed that the woman simply coordinates her schedule when the man invites her, but I’ve seen several people here say that the woman should be the one to ask, so now I’m curious.
👤 Asked by Guest 👩GenderFemale 🎂 Teens 👑 Universe female member
💗 Likes 0 👁️ Views 184 💬 Answers 14
🔖 ID dMKS]-00000 🎯 Looking for answers from 誰でも

7 answers

Fuu
🏅 パパ活歴7年目突入
彼氏/既婚/他パパ/セフレOK/全力応援
Age: 50s 👨 Male Universe member
Since I’m seeing multiple people, coordinating schedules can get complicated, so I reach out and arrange everything myself. Usually, at the end of a date, we tentatively set the next one. Then I coordinate with everyone else and contact them once the schedule is finalized.
(3 replies left)
アンディ
顔合わせの刺激が好きすぎてオファー続けてます。町中華をこよなく愛してます。
Age: 40s 👨 Male Universe member
If I want to see someone again after the first meeting, I’ll reach out, and sometimes they’ll contact me first. If I don’t want to meet again, I simply won’t reach out—and if they contact me, I’ll politely decline. That’s the natural flow of things. After that, I’m usually the one who gets in touch. The reason is simply that I’m selfishly trying to set the schedule myself. That said, some women I haven’t seen in a while do make a point of contacting me every now and then so I won’t forget them. It often makes me think, “Maybe I should see her again,” so I guess their strategy is working. Haha.
(3 replies left)
横断歩道
🏅 デート開拓者
ユニバース5年目。女性とはいろいろな商業施設に行ってデートしています。
Age: 50s 👨 Male Universe member
It just seems like popular women are more often contacted by men, while women are more likely to reach out to a good papa. Once you get close, you’ll naturally start saying things like, “Let’s go here next time,” during your date, and the next one will fall into place.
(3 replies left)
システムエンジニアの会員
システムエンジニアの会員 ? Send a reverse offer to this responder
Other
In my case, both happen, but lately I’ve been waiting for the women to reach out more often. When a woman contacts me first, she tends to be more motivated.
(3 replies left)
負け男
🏅 プロおぢ。ほんとはプロパパと名乗りたいけど名乗るほどの実力がない名古屋の汚っさんです。
Age: Private 👨 Male Universe member
I have quite a few monthly arrangements, but unless a girl is a particular favorite of mine, I won’t meet her unless she invites me. There’s probably only one monthly partner I actually take the initiative to invite—the girl who ranks third in my lineup.
(3 replies left)
前澤(スタッフ)
前澤(スタッフ) Male Column Send a reverse offer to this responder
🏅 あなたの味方
お役に立てれば幸いです。
Age: Private 👨 Male Universe staff
I don’t think we collected data on which person usually initiates after the second meeting, but it seems fine to say that whoever wants to meet should make the invitation. If being turned down would be too emotionally difficult, it’s perfectly okay to wait for the other person to reach out. But if you think things would go more smoothly by taking the initiative, then you should invite them yourself.
(3 replies left)
カズ
Age: Private 👨 Male Universe member
It varies from person to person, but I assume a woman will contact me if she’s interested, so I always wait for her to reach out first. So when it comes to a second meeting, the woman is usually the one who invites me—almost 100% of the time, actually. Some women even contact me months or a year after our first meeting, presumably after seeing other men or waiting to see what offers came in. As the relationship continues, different patterns naturally emerge. Before parting ways, she might suggest the next meeting like a dentist scheduling your next appointment. She may contact me toward the end of the month when she wants some spending money, or while we’re meeting or messaging on LINE, one of us might casually suggest going somewhere together next time. And when I’m feeling particularly tempted, I might ask her when she’s available.
(3 replies left)