Is it true that with “grandpa-katsu” involving men in their 60s and older, there are quite a few who will pay an allowance without expecting intimacy?
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I currently set my age limit for offers at 50, but if no intimacy is required, I’m thinking of raising the limit to 70.
Reading posts here, I see women worrying about older men taking a long time to finish, asking for oral, or wanting things to go on for a long time, which makes me nervous. My father is 65, so I’m uncomfortable being intimate with someone older than him.
One of my friends has been receiving an allowance of ¥50,000 every time for over a year just for spending two hours having dinner with someone, and I’m jealous. When it’s a dinner-only arrangement, do you decide on the terms during the first date?
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂20s👑Universe female member
It’s true. I also remember seeing women at clubs saying that age didn’t matter as long as it was dinner only.
Some people give 500,000 yen for dinner once a month, while others give 400,000 yen each time they meet for dinner.
That’s completely out of reach for someone as poor as me, but it does have the effect of making you lose interest in meeting other papas…
There was a woman I met over 300 times a year for several years, just for meals. Looking back, it was kind of like papa-katsu, and she would often jokingly ask me, “Want to do papa-katsu?” (I assume she meant dinner-only papa-katsu), but I just let it go in one ear and out the other. Even so, it’s pretty rare to find a woman you want to keep meeting that many times, even if it’s dinner only.
As in the case of the woman asking this question, I think it would be difficult for things to work out that way if the woman is the one expressing her wishes or negotiating for it.
Neither the woman I’ve met over a thousand times nor the club woman I’ve met several hundred times has ever brought up money or an allowance. So if the woman wants that kind of arrangement, it may be better to leave it up to the man. It may also lead to a good outcome if you quickly determine that he isn’t the type of man who stops making an effort once he has “caught” someone, and then place your trust in him…
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The eldest of the three busty sisters from Hakata is a real grandpa killer.
One of her supporters is a gentleman in his late seventies. Since he’s no longer physically functional, their arrangement is dinner only—50 a month. After every meal, they always have shopping time. Jealous, aren’t you?
I’ve had dinner with the two of them a few times in the past—I’m a grandpa killer too.
The gentleman walks with a cane, while the eldest sister walks slowly beside him with her arm linked through his. They look just like a granddaughter caring for her grandfather, but she never shows the slightest sign of annoyance. It’s truly heartwarming. From the way you phrased your question, though, I got the impression that this probably isn’t something you could do.
And this is the most important point: just because he’s no longer physically functional doesn’t mean he has no desire. In other words, she has to satisfy his fantasies without relying on physical intimacy.
I recommend reading Jun'ichirō Tanizaki’s A Fool’s Diary.
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It’s not hard to imagine that if a woman working at an upscale lounge—who already earns money without an adult relationship—registers with a dating club, she could receive an allowance without an adult relationship, regardless of the man’s age.
(Even if she’s only average-looking, there are various factors, such as being highly skilled at conversation or readily accommodating the man’s schedule.)
At this club, if a woman wants a dinner-only arrangement but is listed as anything other than type “A,” it becomes “type fraud” and can lead to trouble.
One situation in which an arrangement ends up being dinner only despite her not being type “A” is when the date is incredibly enjoyable, but the woman is reluctant to have sex—not strictly against it, but clearly unenthusiastic.
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Why not give it a try?
If you don’t take a chance, you’ll never get to enjoy the rewards.
Luck plays a part too, and it’s not something that works out that easily.
As for your friend, it’s probably one of these:
they just happened to get lucky,
they lied,
or they’re exaggerating a little.
Why not set your dating type to A, remove the age limit, and give it a shot? You won’t know until you try.
If you get an offer, you might be able to build the kind of relationship your friend has. And if you don’t, you’ll at least find out whether you’re lacking in appeal or looks, or whether people see you as having no value unless sex is involved, lol.
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It’s true that some people give an allowance for nothing more than tea or a meal—not just men in their 60s and older.
In fact, when I was in my 30s, I would invite female college students to meals as friends and give them money for transportation. They weren’t people I felt any desire to sleep with, so I invited them purely for companionship and had no interest in taking the relationship any further.
If someone among the questioner’s “friends” is receiving an allowance, then what they’re saying is true, and there’s no need to post the question anonymously. They could simply ask that “friend” how they do it.
If they doubt what this person is saying and think that person wouldn’t tell them anyway, then by my standards, they’re not a “friend” but merely an acquaintance.
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With all due respect, I’d advise you to stop thinking that you can make easy money.
It’s true that some men are willing to pay an allowance for dinner-only (no intimacy) arrangements.
But those men tend to have very high standards when it comes to women.
Even in an anonymous place like this, you casually refer to dating men in their 60s or older as “jiji-katsu.”
I don’t think someone like that could meet the standards that high-level men are looking for.
By the way, if I were a woman, I wouldn’t negotiate the terms when entering an arrangement with a man who only wanted dinner dates.
I’d assume that if he came to like me over time, the allowance would gradually increase.
Dinner-only papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) and papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) involving an adult relationship (intimate) are completely different in terms of mindset.
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