I’ve been registered here for almost six months now. I have a papa (a male supporter) whom I meet once a month on a monthly arrangement, and we’re still in touch even though I haven’t told him my real name.
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I’m thinking I might reveal it once we become closer and I feel I can trust him, but since I’m still using a fake name even while messaging him, I’m starting to wonder what I should do.
Do you all tell the papas you’re getting close to your real names from the beginning? Is it really wrong for me to wait until we’ve been meeting regularly for about a year?
I’d appreciate hearing your thoughts.
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂Not stated👑Universe female member
I know the real names of the three women I’ve been seeing for a long time now, but I learned each one’s at a different point.
There was even one woman whose real name I didn’t know for two years.
So, keeping her name private isn’t necessarily what determines whether the relationship continues.
That said, as a man, I can sense how guarded women are. If she doesn’t have something that makes me want to continue seeing her despite that, we’ll probably end up going our separate ways.
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If they don’t tell me theirs, I wouldn’t tell them mine either.
Most of my papas (male supporters) gave me their business cards and told me about their companies from the very beginning, so I felt comfortable trusting them too.
(That said, I was betrayed once and had my information posted online, so I think it’s best not to share it with anyone except a papa you really like and trust—someone who genuinely values you.)
Personally, if my real name were Ayumi, I’d start by saying, “Please call me Ayu,” and then reveal my real name once we’d grown closer.
With a papa I’ve been seeing for a long time, it naturally comes up, so there’s no need to worry.
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Most women will tell you on the first day.
Most give their real name, while the rest give just their first name.
Very rarely, a woman who seems experienced with papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) will use a single letter in English as her LINE name, so some continue using their club name.
Even if she tells me her last name, I don’t use it when we meet, so I don’t bother remembering it.
I think it’s enough to know it in case her real name is ever needed for some reason, without causing any trouble even if I’m standing right next to her. If you only meet about once a month, those situations probably won’t come up very often, so I don’t think you need to worry about it too much.
If her LINE name is her real name and identifies her, I’d tell her my first name. If it isn’t her real name, I don’t think there’s any need to give her my name.
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People have different preferences, so even if you ask for other people’s opinions here, you won’t know what your own partner thinks.
Personally, I don’t need to know someone’s real name, so I neither ask for it nor give mine. More often than not, I’m told their real name later on, when we play golf or take a trip after seeing each other for a while.
That said, I’ve also met women who handed me their business card when we exchanged contact information or introduced themselves by their real names.
Everyone thinks differently, so I don’t think there’s any one right or wrong approach.
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