I’m currently seeing a woman in her early 20s about twice a month on a pay-per-meeting arrangement at 70.
I’d like to discuss a six-month arrangement at 100, but there are a few things that concern me, so I wanted to ask for your opinions.
- Could she start cutting corners after receiving the 100?
- She seemed aloof from the beginning—can that improve?
- As soon as our adult relationship (intimate) ends, she starts getting ready to leave, which bothers me a little.
Given the situation, should I avoid switching to a monthly or six-month arrangement?
Do you all head home right after some pillow talk once your adult relationship (intimate) is over?
I don’t think she means any harm.
I’d appreciate your advice.
👤Asked byGuest👨GenderMale🎂50s👑Member of another dating club
As Makeotokosan wrote, that’s exactly right.
> The important thing is whether you can honestly say, “Even if she disappeared the moment I gave her a large sum of money, I’d still be able to laugh it off.”
Otherwise, she won’t feel your generosity. If you expect something in return, it’ll just be money wasted.
Whether you do it or not depends on how satisfied you are with the arrangement.
Just hand it over quickly, without any regrets.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
It may feel like everything has already been said, but you should absolutely stop.
Her attitude makes it almost certain that she’s only seeing you for the money. She may not just put in the bare minimum—she might even disappear right in front of you.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
You mean paying about ¥160,000 a month upfront for six months, right?
Since that arrangement is so half-baked, I think you’d be better off walking away—especially with someone who has that kind of attitude. If you try to meet her three times a month, she may become even more unpleasant or simply say goodbye.
If the reason for giving her ¥1 million is that she urgently needs that amount, I think you could give it separately from her allowance. I’ve done that before myself. In other words, I continued seeing her afterward and paid her the normal pay-per-meeting allowance. I only gave her the money upfront because she needed it to repay a debt, as Make-Otoko mentioned.
If she’s someone you’re hesitating over, I’d say it’s better to move on.
Also, it depends on her circumstances, but some girls have curfews and often have to leave in a hurry. If she’s rushing home despite having no particular reason, though, she probably just doesn’t want to spend time with you.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I’ve made three lump-sum advance payments covering more than six months.
*I give enough to cover the amount after taking gift tax into account.*
So far, it’s been two wins and one loss. The one who left will probably come back, since she can still get plenty out of me, haha.
In all three cases, I decided to make the large advance payment before entering into an adult relationship (intimate). They were all for paying off debt.
They told me some pretty suspicious stories about borrowing money from bad sources, like consumer finance companies, and barely being able to keep up with the interest. I took them at their word and gave them the money.
The important question is whether you can honestly say, “Even if she disappeared the moment I handed over that much money, I could still laugh it off.”
You’re already worried, aren’t you? Then you should absolutely stop. To put it in Fist of the North Star terms:
“You are already defeated.”
I only make advance payments because I’m confident that she’ll never meet a papa (a male supporter) better than me, so she won’t run away.
Though I did get abandoned once despite that confidence, haha. But I’m completely fine and totally relaxed. She’ll probably come back eventually anyway, and when she does, I’m planning to just cut her loose without asking for the money back.
When dogs sense that you’re afraid of them, they pick up on it and start barking or biting, right?
But if you approach confidently, they’re usually docile. Women are the same.
*I’m not saying women are dogs, okay?*
Just get yourself completely ready, stand in front of her, and casually hand her the money while saying:
“Here’s six months’ worth.”
That’s all it takes. But if you’re scared like the person asking this question, she’ll bite you, pee on you, and it’ll all be over.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
Looking at the concerns you listed, I think the answer is already pretty clear.
She’s making the effort because of the 70,000-yen allowance.
Being distant and getting ready to leave right away—doesn’t that say it all?
If you want to keep her tied to you, I get the feeling from your post that you need to become a more appealing partner.
Akari
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
Aren’t you probably the seventh man this woman is seeing?
You’re better off not entering into a monthly arrangement.
She’s doing a good job of deceiving you.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
You might be lucky if it ends with him just going through the motions.
In the end, it may turn into a pay-per-meeting arrangement for 100,000 yen.
If it’s the dinner-then-hotel pattern, it’s pretty normal to have some pillow talk and then part ways.
That said, how much time he spends on pillow talk can have a big impact on the man’s satisfaction.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I don’t know how long you’ve been seeing each other, but as they say, “Slow and steady wins the race.” It might be worth watching how things develop a little longer.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
I only switch to a monthly arrangement with people I trust and have been seeing for a year or more, when paying the allowance each time becomes a hassle.
You should stop.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
Female member Potassium here.
Honestly, if there’s something bothering you, you’re the one who’ll regret it later, so why take an unnecessary risk?
Also, I don’t think you should expect the woman to improve. With that kind of attitude, you probably won’t see any improvement anyway.
If it were a papa (a male supporter) I didn’t particularly like—or didn’t want to see—and my goal was simply to get money, I’d probably take the ¥1 million and disappear. It’s awful, but some women who are only in it for the money and don’t feel guilty might do that. If I were a man, I wouldn’t take that kind of risk. If I didn’t care about losing ¥1 million, I might do it as a sort of money-gifting gesture, though.
For reference, I have a monthly arrangement with my papa, but we spend about three times as long chatting and cuddling during pillow talk as we do being intimate. I value the time we spend together. If it just ends after intimacy, I feel it’s no different from working independently in the sex industry...
That said, if it’s sex after a date, there have been times when we went our separate ways afterward.
If she isn’t the type of papa-katsu woman who enjoys spending time together, I think you should avoid the risk yourself so that neither you nor she ends up feeling uncomfortable later.
That’s just my personal opinion.
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
You should absolutely end it.
I can’t help wondering if you’re still seeing him simply because the allowance is pretty good.
As I always say, I’m seeing someone I truly adore, and I feel genuinely grateful that I can enjoy delicious meals with him, be intimate, and receive an allowance too. But that doesn’t seem to be how things are for you.
Marika
(3 replies left)
(3 replies left)
💡 This question has no password registered, so the reply feature is unavailable.
If you access from the device/browser used to post the question, you may be able to set a password later.
