For a monthly arrangement, do you still give her an allowance during months you can’t meet?
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I’ve been in a monthly arrangement with a woman for two years.
As the pandemic gradually comes under control, I expect to have more business trips and may end up having months when we can’t meet. I’d like to continue seeing her, but I’m unsure about paying her allowance for months we can’t meet. For example, if we couldn’t meet for two months, would it be proper to give her both months’ allowance when we finally meet again? Due to various circumstances, I can’t transfer the money. I haven’t told her about this yet.
I’m asking to hear from men who are in monthly arrangements. Thank you in advance.
👤Asked byGuest👨GenderMale🎂50s👑Universe male member
If he doesn’t pay for months when you can’t meet, that’s not a monthly arrangement.
Weren’t you the one called “Mr. Loser”?
You were saying, “Just because I haven’t parked my car in a monthly parking lot even once this month doesn’t mean I don’t have to pay,” weren’t you?
For once, I actually agreed with you, lol.
Marika
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If it’s a monthly arrangement, shouldn’t the allowance be paid even when you don’t meet?
A stable allowance that doesn’t change from month to month—that’s the difference between pay-per-meeting and a monthly arrangement, right?
Otherwise, what’s the difference?
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If you can’t meet, why not think of it in terms of averaging things out?
Consider whether you’d be comfortable giving her enough for the next year—or perhaps a few months—in advance. If you wouldn’t regret it even if you ended up unable to see her again, you could simply hand it over casually, saying, “Hold on to this for now,” or give it to her as her allowance. Either way, I think leaving a lasting impression before you go on your business trip would be a good idea.
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You’d still have to pay rent even when you’re away on a business trip and not living there. If you don’t like that, you can stay at a hotel instead.
A monthly arrangement works the same way. You pay even when you can’t meet. If you don’t want that, just make it pay-per-meeting.
But if the terms keep changing whenever it suits the man, the woman may decide she’s better off looking for another man.
That’s something to keep in mind as well.
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Since it’s a monthly arrangement, I receive the allowance even in months when we can’t meet.
If he knows in advance that we won’t be able to meet, he gives it to me ahead of time. But if you don’t want to give the allowance when you can’t meet, I think it would be better to end the monthly arrangement and switch to pay-per-meeting.
I feel that my papa also chose a monthly arrangement because he doesn’t want me to have other papas. If that’s how your partner feels, she may start seeing someone else.
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You can just meet whenever you have a break between business trips. I’m sure you’ll figure something out.
I’m not on a monthly arrangement, and I don’t travel for work, but I manage my schedule so the allowance stays consistent. I transferred the money once, but since then I’ve always handed it over in person. Bank transfers leave a paper trail, so they’re definitely not recommended.
Set a date with plenty of time to spare, then stay flexible and adapt as circumstances change. You can usually make it work somehow.
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From a woman’s perspective, with a monthly arrangement, she receives an allowance even if you don’t meet—so there’s always the risk that she may not want to see you. That’s why she may think, “What an amazing papa—he trusted me.” And that naturally gives rise to a sense of gratitude.
So if you’re reluctant to pay even when you don’t meet—the very foundation of a monthly arrangement—she may start to wonder, “Then what’s the point of having a monthly arrangement?” That’s the risk.
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I have several women on monthly and six-month arrangements. I’ve lost count of how many months I haven’t even met my ace, and I’ve continued giving her money even when we haven’t had an adult relationship for more than six months.
When she’s on her period, she can’t meet her other papas, so an important part of being a monthly papa is meeting women on monthly or six-month arrangements during that time, taking them out for dinner, and treating it as though you had an adult date.
If you aren’t prepared to pay even when you can’t meet, you shouldn’t enter a monthly arrangement. Pay them as usual, even when you can’t see them. Then watch how they behave afterward—if she acts like, “Lucky me, I still get paid even when we don’t meet♪,” it’s perfectly fine to end things.
On the other hand, if she tries to make up for it by saying something like, “We haven’t been able to meet, so let’s see each other a lot next month,” she’s worth keeping. When she makes that kind of suggestion, gently turn down the offer to increase the number of meetings. If you do that, she may become completely devoted to you.
A papa’s most important job is putting on a brave face. Keep enduring, keep enduring, save it all up, and then go for one huge release.
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