Why can papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) couples walk around town so openly these days?
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I wouldn’t think twice about a “woman in her 40s × man in his 40s or older” couple, but a “woman around 30 or younger × man in his 40s or older” couple feels so wrong that whenever one catches my eye, it makes me feel sick. They’re nothing but a public nuisance.
I don’t want to see them out in the open in town or in restaurants. Can’t they keep it discreet and do it somewhere people can’t see them?
Those lovey-dovey couples in their 20s are getting on my nerves, and I’m having to put up with it too, so could you educate everyone in their 20s and ask them to stop?
Just kidding—let people do whatever they want.
Marika
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Are you jumping to conclusions, questioner?
Marriages between men in their 40s and older and women in their early 30s or younger aren’t exactly common, but they do happen fairly often.
Do those couples have to keep their relationship secret, too?
If they’re openly being overly affectionate in public, you could say it violates public decency—but the same would apply to couples in their 20s, wouldn’t it?
Don’t judge everything through the lens of your own limited perspective.
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Why do you assume that a woman around 30 or younger with a man in his 40s or older must be papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan)?
Are you sure it really is papa-katsu? They could be married in an age-gap relationship.
Did you actually approach them and ask whether it was papa-katsu?
It may all just be your own assumptions.
Also, you may be someone who can’t adapt to society, or you may have some underlying mental health issue.
You might want to take some kind of action, such as avoiding going outside or getting examined at a hospital.
> “Why can they walk around town so openly?”
Why are you able to walk around town so openly?
I think it would be good for you to think carefully about that.
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I think it’s because they don’t worry about what others think, like you do.
If the woman is uncomfortable with it, I think he should stop. But if both people are fine with it, I don’t think it’s really anyone else’s place to judge.
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Even though they dislike it, they deliberately come all the way here to look—and then complain. Deep down, they must be incredibly jealous.
Apparently, people who go overboard online criticizing other people’s irrelevant affairs may actually want to have one themselves so badly that they can’t stand it, and that desire gets turned into anger instead (lol). Like, “I’m restraining myself, so why shouldn’t they?!”
It’s possible that, without even realizing it, you’re actually envious.
If that’s not the case, then spending time complaining about strangers who have nothing to do with you is truly a waste—and it’s not good for your mental health either. I think it would be better for you not to come here at all.
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If you’ve never experienced papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), would you really think, “That’s definitely papa-katsu! It’s an eyesore and a public nuisance”?
I never thought that way before I knew about papa-katsu. I assumed they were a woman who worked at a nightlife establishment and one of her customers.
Maybe you’re actually interested in papa-katsu and want to try it but feel anxious. Or perhaps you haven’t experienced it yet but have already signed up—and are jealous because no offers are coming your way. Sorry if I’m wrong.
You don’t need to pay that much attention to other people, and there really are couples with large age gaps.
People are people, and you are you. Don’t let something like that irritate you!
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People don’t really pay that much attention to others, you know? Since you’ve never done papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), maybe it just doesn’t look good to you?
If it were me, I’d try not to stare too much either ( ´・ω・｀)
Also, my ex-boyfriend was 16 years older than me, so they might simply be a regular couple (・・;
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You can walk around normally, can’t you? Why are you so concerned about what people around you think?
If you’re happily in a normal relationship, you wouldn’t care about others at all… And if you weren’t doing papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), you probably wouldn’t give it a second thought either.
If you’ve never done papa-katsu, why does it bother you?
These days, we don’t even know our neighbors’ last names. Do you really care that much about other people?
I’m Hikōki, and today I spent the whole day—from morning until late at night—walking around town closely with my date. He’s a low-paying papa (a male supporter), so the allowance was the same as for a two-hour date. If it had been someone over 20 outside the club, there wouldn’t have been any allowance at all—and if it were my daughter, obviously there wouldn’t be one either.
Also, I think men in their 50s and beyond have a kind of comfort and calm that men in their 40s and younger can’t offer.
If the person asking this question can’t appreciate that appeal, it’s simply because their sensitivity isn’t focused in that direction. Everyone is drawn to different things, and the fact that you’re still bothered by it just shows you’re still young and inexperienced.
People’s appeal and what they can offer change with age. The ability to handle situations, cultivated through experience, can’t exist without building up that experience over time. Looks may decline after peaking around 20, but in the end, what makes two people click isn’t their age—it’s their compatibility.
I was never approached by women or treated to drinks at bars when I was younger, but after reaching my late 40s, it started happening quite often. So I assume there must be something about my atmosphere now that’s different from when I was young.
For men, I’ve recently started thinking that it takes reaching a certain age to be able to convey calm, stability, and comfort instantly—even without saying a word. If a young man had that kind of presence, it would probably feel creepy instead.
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I can’t—and don’t—walk around town with my PJ partners.
If we absolutely have to walk around in public, I walk ahead and have them follow about five meters behind me.
The only time we really walk side by side is when we’re driving somewhere like a resort area, the suburbs, or the countryside.
When you’re considerate of a woman, they really do grow attached to you. Since they act aloof in public, they become much more affectionate once we’re indoors.
I sometimes see papa-katsu couples out in public. When the woman looks like she’s enjoying herself, it’s rather heartwarming. But when I see a girl with completely dead eyes, I find myself thinking, “Yeah, that figures. I really shouldn’t be walking around town with a young woman,” all over again.
That said, I believe I’ve polished myself enough to make a young woman think, “Maybe I could walk around in public next to this person.” I pay an almost excessive amount of attention to my appearance—including my fashion—my cleanliness, and even my scent.
In fact, I regularly walk around town with young women who aren’t my PJ partners. I even approach women in public myself.
It seems like girls who aren’t involved in papa-katsu don’t really care whether or not they walk around town with someone. Am I wrong?
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There’s nothing wrong with simply walking together. What kind of discrimination is that? lol
People walk around together like that at work too. The same goes for close parent-and-child pairs. If seeing that makes you vomit in public, you must be vomiting in public all the time—you’re the public nuisance here.
That said, I do think you should stop holding hands or getting all lovey-dovey, since no one wants to watch that. Those of us with experience just think, “Ah, they’re doing that,” though. At famous establishments, half the customers may be couples like that. Still, by ordinary standards, you should realize that it looks like a tasteless public humiliation show.
But if I were serious about someone, I’d do it normally. Judging from the staff’s reactions, they seem positive about it. Maybe it’s because I choose good places—I’ve been to lounges at the Ritz, for example. In the first place, it’s no problem overseas, and at the time I thought Japan wasn’t so bad after all.
Maybe the nausea is actually disgust toward yourself for not being able to be honest.
Taro
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