Is it normal not to reserve a restaurant for a date?
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Recently, I was offered a date and met up with a man, only to find that he hadn’t reserved a restaurant. We usually end up wandering around looking for somewhere to eat, and since nothing has been reserved, we can’t get in anywhere, so I end up saying, “Let’s just go here,” and choosing the restaurant myself.
I dress up and wear heels because it’s a date, so it’s disappointing, and my feet hurt too.
I want to enjoy dinner dates as well, and some men even write that they want you to come hungry—so what are they thinking when they arrange to meet without reserving a restaurant?
For the record, I’ve already pointed this out to the men.
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂Not stated👑Universe female member
I really feel for you—you shouldn’t have to walk until your feet hurt in heels 😭
I’m not sure about making reservations since I leave that to the men, but I’ll try to speak up earlier too and say, “My feet are already hurting 😭”
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You still received your transportation allowance from a man like that, didn’t you?
Who do you think you are, warning the man about his behavior?
To be honest, I thought you came across as rather unpleasant.
I get the feeling the man may have written a negative review about you after the date.
You may have meant well, but I recommend not handling things this way next time.
If you were dissatisfied, you should have simply given him a poor rating in the post-date survey.
If the club receives enough negative feedback about him, they’ll warn him, and if he doesn’t improve, he’ll probably be asked to leave the club.
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I would never choose to go to a restaurant that accepts reservations without making one.
Rather than putting my brain through the unpleasant stress of wondering, “Will we be able to get in?” or “Do we have to find another place?” I’d much rather use that mental energy to come up with creative ways to keep the conversation flowing and make the date more enjoyable, haha.
I have gone on dates to popular restaurants that don’t take reservations and usually have lines. Of course, I get the woman’s consent beforehand. If we arrive a little early and get in line before the agreed-upon time, I think it minimizes the inconvenience for her.
If it’s a woman I’ve been seeing for a long time, we can enjoy waiting in line together to some extent. But for a first date, I definitely wouldn’t choose a restaurant that doesn’t accept reservations.
—It’s me
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I don’t think that’s very common.
When I make arrangements, I generally meet without making a reservation at a restaurant beforehand.
I ask what they feel like eating that day, then we drive to a restaurant. Sometimes I ask where they’d like to go and take them on a long drive somewhere.
Since I can’t tell what kind of date would be best until we meet, I decide afterward where to go, what to eat, what to see, or what to do.
Paper Airplane
These days, it’s become much easier to find reliable reviews, hasn’t it?
As a professional on the providing side of the food industry, I used to enjoy choosing promising-looking restaurants based on their appearance and exploring them through food walks. But now we live in an age where you can narrow down your choices online without having to visit so many places.
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I think that man just wasn’t thinking things through.
I generally make reservations, not just for the first meeting. If I don’t have a reservation, I have a few places in mind and check with them before heading over.
Besides, I wouldn’t make someone walk around that much in the first place.
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Joe may not exactly be the most polished or refined guy, but even he wouldn’t wait until the day of to look for a restaurant.
If she cancels at the last minute, I can just go by myself and pay for two. Maybe it’s an unusual way of handling things, but sometimes the staff even come to my rescue.
I’ve also asked a woman passing by to come with me to the restaurant. She happened to be an acquaintance, though（笑）
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I’ve also shown up twice only to find that no reservation had been made, so I ended up walking around.
One of those times was on a rainy day, and I ruined a pair of heels.
The other time, everywhere was full, so he suggested Tully’s Coffee instead.
I thought, “Something’s seriously wrong with him,” and politely declined.
As Mack said, I think there are two possibilities: he’s never been popular and simply doesn’t know any better, or he’s so popular that he doesn’t need to try.
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To me, not making a reservation for a date through a dating club isn’t normal.
As for what he was thinking, just ask him directly when you bring it up with him.
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I don’t understand why someone would specifically write, “I’d like to enjoy a dinner date too, so please come hungry,” yet not even make a reservation. These days, it’s hard to get into any good restaurant without one.
That said, I recently read a man’s dating review saying that his first date had been canceled, but he couldn’t cancel the sushi reservation he’d made and was left in a difficult situation. I felt bad for him. I remember thinking, “If our schedules matched, I’d happily go and let him treat me to sushi!”
So maybe people who’ve had experiences that traumatic simply don’t make restaurant reservations anymore.
And if the man pointed it out to her, isn’t that enough?!
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