I was intimate with him for the first time the other day, but perhaps because it had been five years since the last time, it was too painful and we couldn’t go through with it.
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It’s always been easy for me to feel pain, and since it had been so long this time, even the slightest movement caused excruciating pain, despite being aroused.
He’s a kind papa (a male supporter), so he comforted me this time, but I’m worried that if it continues like this, he may gradually become reluctant to give me an allowance.
To the men →
Would you dislike a woman who feels pain every time and can’t go through with it? Normally, you would, right…
To the women →
Do you think I should go to the hospital after all?
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂Not stated👑Universe female member
Do you dislike sex?
If you do, you should quit papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) that involves an adult relationship (intimate). If you continue, stick to dinner only (no intimacy).
From a man’s perspective, if he finds someone who has a great personality, shares his values, is fun to talk to, makes him feel comfortable, and is also highly compatible in an adult relationship (intimate), dealing with someone who complains that it hurts is just way too much hassle.
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If I remember correctly, some gynecologists offer examinations and training for pain during sex. You should be able to find information online.
I’m also curious about what kind of pain it is.
If it were me, I’d go to the hospital.
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Lube—Wettra, specifically—is a must, so if that still doesn’t work, it’s best to give up on him. He’ll probably be a good match for men who are less well-endowed.
If you leave a week between meetings, things will tighten up again, so if you want to keep the possibility open, you’d have to try three days in a row to gradually get used to it.
If the conversation is enjoyable, you can still continue seeing him for dinner only.
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If it was because this was your first intimate experience in five years, I feel like it should be okay, since it may stop hurting in time.
I’m not sure what will happen if things continue this way indefinitely, but if it gradually improves, the man may actually prefer things that way.
It may also depend on whether he’s willing to accept the current situation for a few months, and how attractive you are to him in ways other than intimacy.
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I’m probably the second most well-endowed respondent after Seattle, so I run into “pain issues” fairly often.
These days, my next ace has been experiencing some discomfort, so we use lotion, and from behind we only do it lying down.
Both my current ace and former ace feel a little pain at the beginning. In other words, the three regulars I especially favor aren’t the best physical matches, but they’re the three who give me the highest allowance.
Like Early, I don’t prioritize physical compatibility, so it’s not a problem at all.
What matters are:
- Whether I want to help this girl grow
- Whether giving her money feels good to me
Those are the two key points.
This is beside the point, but aren’t young guys these days kind of small? I always assumed I was poorly endowed, yet they invariably say, “Wow… that’s big.”
And young guys don’t seem to have the stamina to keep moving their hips, either. Go do some weight training and running.
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I do want to be intimate with a girl I like, and I wouldn’t want intimacy to be off the table. But it isn’t especially high on my list of priorities, relatively speaking, and I’d feel bad if it was painful for her, so I’m looking into ways to improve things.
One of the girls I’m seeing was like that.
I’m not sure whether it’s a matter of experience or simply that being with someone she likes makes her feel more satisfied, but I honestly don’t really understand what people mean by “physical compatibility” (lol).
I feel like I’m currently being a good papa (a male supporter), so I’m hoping we can look for ways to improve things together.
I’m looking forward to Mac’s answer.
[Edit]
To Mac,
That was exactly the impression I had, so I’ve been waiting for your answer (lol).
I’m always learning from your posts.
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For example, let’s say there are four ways to gauge your compatibility with a woman:
1) Whether your values align
2) Whether your needs and wants align
3) How comfortable you feel together
4) Your physical compatibility
For men who prioritize the time they spend being intimate, number 4 is important.
For men who prioritize dating in the broader sense, 1, 2, and 3 are essential. In other words, if they value the time spent together above all else, it’s difficult unless all three—1, 2, and 3—are there. Number 4 may still matter, but it’s no longer essential. Even if you’re not physically compatible, the other three can make up for it.
So which type is your papa?
If he’s already treating you kindly, showing your appreciation and acting sweet and adorably coy will probably make him cherish you even more and grow fonder of you.
Personally, even if number 4 didn’t work out, I’d still feel satisfied just cuddling and being affectionate on a bed or in a private room.
—It’s me
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