Tips
Aug 31, 2021 23:53
9 answers
🏅 あなたの味方
お役に立てれば幸いです。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe staff
Maezawa from the CEO’s office here.
> Where can I meet a sincere, gentlemanly man with a strong character? I’m not talking about looks—I want to meet someone who’s impressive on the inside.
I think there are plenty of men who have a strong character.
However, once you add “sincere” and “gentlemanly” to the list, I think it becomes considerably more difficult.
For example, some people may not find it very convincing if a married man—or someone who is already dating another woman—makes an offer here and claims to be sincere.
That said, he may very well be sincere toward the woman he’s seeing.
So whether someone is considered sincere also depends on where you set the standard for sincerity. Depending on that standard, finding such a man may be difficult.
The same goes for whether someone is a gentleman—there are various ways to define that, which makes it difficult as well.
With that in mind, I do think there are men who are sincere and gentlemanly toward the women they see, and who have a strong character.
But if your standards are too high, you may end up concluding that no such person exists.
It might be worth starting by considering whether your own standards are unrealistically high.
Meg
Female
Send a reverse offer to this responder
🏅 修行の身
光と影
Age: 50s
👩 Female
Former Universe member
I’m Meg, a female member.
Maybe you’ve only been getting offers from difficult people… I’m sorry, but all I can say is that I feel for you.
I’ve never used any apps or anything—this was my first experience with papa-katsu.
Maybe my papa (a male supporter) has a bad side too, but perhaps I’m seeing him through rose-colored glasses. In front of me, though, he’s always been a sincere gentleman.
Other
I’m Shingo Lee, a columnist.
There’s something called the “male triangle of impossibility”: being handsome, high-earning, and sincere are three qualities that rarely coexist in one man.
On rare occasions, a man may have all three, but because he’s extremely desirable, he gets approached relentlessly from around age 20, when he enters the dating market. As a result, he either loses his sincerity or gets married early and leaves the dating market.
If you look for a gentleman who is both high-earning and sincere, you still have a chance.
Men like that don’t tend to enter the dating market easily.
The quickest approach is to ask a high-earning man, “I don’t care about looks, so could you introduce me to a younger man from your workplace?”
They’re usually too busy to appear on dating apps, and if you meet through an acquaintance, you’re less likely to be treated casually and discarded.
Other
I’m Tetsu, a male club member.
You shouldn’t expect that from men at the club. It’s like looking for a woman who is both impeccably virtuous and stunningly beautiful.
🏅 ４０歳でリアル異世界転生したオッサン l 元金融マン → 現ＡＩ界隈
出張ホストの実技試験合格してるので、対女性への無難な前戯とかマナーに一定の知見あり。
Age: 40s
👨 Male
Universe member
I’m Flag Maker, a column writer.
They’re not here. It’s like trying to find an angel in hell. Every single one of them is a morally bankrupt piece of trash.
People often tell me I’m “a good person,” but I just think, “In what way? Are you blind?”
Still, it’s easy to imagine the good in people, and you don’t learn much from it. But the ugly side of people can go beyond your imagination, so I believe that meeting and having experiences with terrible people makes for better life experience.
You can only say, “I don’t want to meet awful people,” after you’ve stopped trusting them and developed the ability to sense their presence and avoid them.
Personally, I judge people based on their bad qualities rather than their good ones. So even if someone is mostly decent, if they have one truly awful side, they’re a terrible person to me. Which means almost everyone is terrible.
At that point, I actually find people who know they’re terrible more likable. Maybe that’s why most of my friends are awful people.
A～Dまで一通りオファーの経験あり、多くても月１程度でLINEはスケジュール調整のみ、スマートに無理なく長期交際するスタイルです。
Age: 50s
👨 Male
Universe member
I’m Dai, a male member.
When it comes to character rather than looks, both men and women have their share of less admirable sides.
What makes it interesting, though, is that among them, there are still a few men and women with genuinely beautiful hearts.
Men, at least, are choosing for themselves, so even when things don’t work out, they can usually accept it to some extent and think, “I’ll just move on to the next one.”
For women, though, whether they’ll meet a man who’s gentlemanly and truly admirable may simply come down to luck…
🏅 パパ活歴7年目突入
彼氏/既婚/他パパ/セフレOK/全力応援
Age: 50s
👨 Male
Universe member
This is columnist Fuu.
It doesn’t sound like you’re likely to find the kind of gentleman you’re looking for through papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan).
I’ve also tried sugar dating. People’s selfishness shows even more on the lawless wilderness of the web. Papa-katsu has systems in place to make it safer, and Universe has more quality members than the apps. If you still feel that way there, I don’t think papa-katsu is a good fit for you mentally. It’s not worth continuing if it makes you feel this way. I recommend quitting papa-katsu and earning money on your own.
🏅 倶楽部女性のご主人様に潤いを！
Mパパ、永遠の交際継続中！
B1タイプ〜A寄りパパです！
会う度大人は嫌と感じる方………ご相談ください。
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe member
I’m Paper Airplane, a male member.
It’s possible that’s how they see you.
I’m sure you have plenty of good qualities, so have the courage and confidence to focus on them.
And try believing in yourself, too.
Age: Private
👨 Male
Universe member
I’m Kazu, a male member.
I believe an honest gentleman naturally pairs with an honest lady.