I always set up a next meeting with women I like.

No woman is going to message a man repeatedly if she only sees him about once a month. I think the reason is that she doesn’t know his schedule, so it’s difficult for her to invite him out. I also only see mine about once a month, so I only hear from her when it’s been an unusually long time since we last met. If you want her to message you regularly, you’ll need to see her at least once a week.

Some women are very proactive about papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), while others do it reluctantly, feeling they have no choice because they need the money. I think it’s the same on the papa’s side, too. Some people lose motivation, or go through periods when they’re just not feeling it. I agree with Fuu that the questioner and the papa should both reach out. In my case, it’s easier to set the schedule if I take the initiative, and since I also want to see my other women in monthly arrangements, I like to stay in control of the scheduling, haha. In the end, you naturally end up continuing with the women who reply properly and show initiative. Women who stop contacting you often just gradually fade out, I guess.

I’m not the female member you wanted an answer from, sorry. But this is honestly something a male member can answer too. If she says she’ll meet when you invite her, I don’t think she dislikes you that much. But if she doesn’t want to meet you proactively, then maybe it’s one of these: the allowance is too low, the time commitment is too long to be worth it, or there’s simply something about you she finds instinctively off-putting. That said, a guy who gets tons of messages from women saying, “I want to see you” or “Please meet me” isn’t necessarily popular. It could just be that he pays a generous allowance or offers good value for a short amount of time. To be blunt—and I can say this because I’m in my 60s—just the fact that we’re meeting young women and pretending to go on dates is practically a miracle. You’re free to cultivate a fantasy world in your head, but if you show it off here, you’ll only embarrass yourself, so let’s stop, fellow old-timer. I’m writing this because I can’t stand to watch it—not to insult you. “Is this kind of thing an obstacle to a long-term relationship”? Is that supposed to be a senryu? Once you’re over 60, let’s stop writing things like “relationship” about ourselves. You’re just paying someone to spend time with you, so don’t call it a “relationship” yourself. It’s embarrassing. The fundamental mistake is thinking you can ask women how they really feel and get them to explain it in words. Those creatures—especially the species known as PJs—never tell you what they truly think. They only show you through their behavior. And in your case, that behavior is that she only agrees to go on dates when you make the effort first. What more of an “answer” from her could you possibly need?

Assuming a papa’s role is to fulfill a woman’s wishes: When a woman wants to meet or likes someone, she’ll actively message him on LINE to arrange a meeting, so there’s usually little need for the man to initiate. Of course, women also care about the man’s feelings and reactions. Knowing that her papa likes her—and likes her quite a lot—while also seeming trustworthy and happy to see her gives her the excitement of feeling welcomed. It also satisfies that desire for recognition that the media has been talking about lately, making her feel even happier and more fulfilled. For the first few months, either person may initiate, but over time, things naturally settle into a regular pattern—whether they meet every day or once a month. Since younger women generally have less freedom to adjust their schedules than older papas, it seems natural that the woman would be the one to initiate. If a woman still never reaches out after a long time, you can probably assume that meeting you isn’t part of her everyday life, even if she doesn’t dislike you. When the relationship is good, a papa can easily become someone she needs—even more than a disliked boss or her female friends. So it may be a good idea to become part of her everyday life, or to create opportunities where she can relax and enjoy herself freely in a way that only a papa can provide. It may also be worth analyzing whether you’re the type of person who enjoys doing what the person you’re with wants to do. Even if it isn’t something you personally want to do, can you feel happy seeing the woman you’re with enjoy herself? For example, when traveling, men may look forward mostly to time in bed. But if the trip is so much fun and exciting that the woman completely forgets about that, can you still be happy together, even as the time flies by? Can you enjoy the trip together to that extent? If you can have that much fun together—even without an adult relationship (intimate)—then even if you run out of time, a very short time in bed can still be deeply satisfying and exciting. Otherwise, it just becomes a typical papa-katsu adult relationship. A woman can have an adult relationship anytime in her everyday life, so the things you can only do while traveling are more precious. Looking back later, those individual moments can remain as truly happy memories—special moments that become cherished memories for the papa, too.