I have a papa (a male supporter) whom I’m quite close to, since we see each other fairly often.
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When he’s having a great time, he seems really happy, but when he isn’t, his voice, energy, and facial expressions all become very flat.
There’s a noticeable difference in his mood. I wonder if it’s just his personality, but I tend to worry about it a lot and would like to know why.
Sometimes I think he’s lost interest because he seems so low-key and distant, yet he’ll still invite me on dates when he’s free.
Men, can you think of any possible reasons for this?
We’ve been seeing each other for almost a year.
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂20s👑Universe female member
I’d like to say that I don’t really have many ups and downs emotionally, but one of the women I was seeing once bluntly said, “You’re tired today, aren’t you?”
She was right—I was exhausted from work. Since we hadn’t been seeing each other for very long, I was impressed by how perceptive she was.
Even men on dating club platforms have all kinds of things going on, so sometimes we get tired or feel down too.
Just think, “Papa has it tough too,” and give him a little understanding. Haha.
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Some men, like me, are total pervs who feel all their fatigue melt away when they’re with a woman and get more energized the longer they spend together. But there are also men who find it tiring being with a woman for too long.
Some people genuinely enjoy entertaining women and making them feel welcome, while others don’t.
Also, I feel like men generally aren’t as expressive with their emotions as women are.
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In my case, after about six months, I tend to stop adjusting myself to the other person and interact more according to my own mood, openly showing my emotions.
By that point, the unreasonable girls have usually weeded themselves out, so I rarely get angry anymore.
When I have work or other things on my mind, I can’t fully focus on what’s in front of me and tend to act rather matter-of-factly.
It’s not that I’ve started disliking them. If anything, I’ve simply let my guard down and want to enjoy an easier, more relaxed relationship.
Maybe they understand that this is just the kind of person I am, because no one has ever complained or said goodbye because of it.
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My partner is the same. When he’s so matter-of-fact, you can’t help wondering if he’s angry, right?
But that’s not it—it’s just his personality, and he also has a demanding job.
Being with someone like that has started to wear me down emotionally, so I’m trying to figure out how to end things naturally.
If it’s becoming painful for you too, it’s okay to say goodbye.
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Can’t you just accept that that’s simply the kind of person they are?
Even someone who seems detached probably has things they enjoy, and they may also feel like spending time with women to pass the time.
Personally, when I see someone working with an unusually high-energy attitude—like a maid café employee—I sometimes wonder whether they’re completely exhausted and low-energy when they’re alone, and find myself wanting to peek into places like the staff waiting room or employees’ smoking area.
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