I recently met a woman through a dating club, and we’ve decided to continue seeing each other.
For subsequent dates, do you usually pay or receive transportation costs separately from the allowance?
Please answer based on meeting within a typical distance, rather than cases involving expensive bullet train or airfare and significant travel time.
👤Asked byGuest👨GenderMale🎂Not stated👑Universe male member
I don’t usually pay, but if they’ve come from really far away, I might give them a little extra—if I like them, that is.
If I don’t like them, I won’t give them anything.
It depends on the situation.
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We went through a few twists and turns, but now I pay transportation costs separately from the allowance. There’s no particular reason—it’s simply one of the terms of the arrangement.
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I don’t give it separately.
Under the club’s rules, transportation expenses are only covered for dates arranged through the club. I make that clear when discussing the allowance.
I may give her money for a taxi or similar expenses, though.
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Papa shouldn’t get hung up on such small details.
To the woman receiving it, even ¥2,000 or ¥3,000 makes a big difference…
You don’t necessarily have to give extra, but I think it’s nice to let her feel like she’s getting a little more out of it—even if it means you’re giving up a bit more.
Basically, it comes down to how much you want to give her in total. Since it’s about showing your feelings, it’s also important to give a little extra at moments that will make her happy.
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I make it clear from the start that transportation costs are included, so I don’t pay anything separately from the allowance.
That said, I’ll sometimes drive her home, get her a taxi, or give her a little extra on a whim.
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For the first three years of our relationship, I also covered her transportation costs on top of her allowance. Since she wasn’t working full-time and we had a significant age gap, I ended up being overly generous.
She would say things like, “I used the transportation money to buy a commuter pass for my part-time job（笑）” or “It’s too late today, so I have to take a taxi home,” and there were even times when I ended up paying twice（笑）
I still remember telling her, “The transportation money is meant to cover the expense of coming to see me, not for getting to your part-time job（笑）.” Good times（笑）
She’s working now and has her own income, so I don’t cover her transportation costs anymore.
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From the second meeting onward, I only pay the allowance. I make that clear when we negotiate the terms.
Occasionally, a girl will ask for travel expenses at the second meeting, saying it’s the club’s rule. Whether she genuinely believes that or is just trying to get more money while knowing she might be refused, I don’t meet her again after that.
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I don’t give it separately.
My understanding is that local transportation costs are included in the allowance.
I’ve also never had a woman tell me that she needed transportation money in addition to the allowance.
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