What’s the difference between papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) and compensated dating?

I see papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) as something between being a kept woman and compensated dating. To me, compensated dating means having a transactional relationship with someone you don’t even like, purely for money. Some women who do papa-katsu have that same mindset, so it’s no different from compensated dating. But others genuinely like the man they’re seeing and end up developing a deeper relationship with him. Those women approach it more like being a kept woman. Put simply, I guess you could say that giving an allowance to a fuck buddy turns it into papa-katsu. As for why an allowance is given, I think it’s something the man also needs in order to maintain a clear boundary.

I think the difference between enjo kōsai (compensated dating) and papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) is simply a matter of the times. The term enjo kōsai dates back to the 1980s, after all. In 1980, Seiko Matsuda made her debut, YMO went on their first world tour, and in 1982, Takashi Hosokawa’s “Kitasakaba” won the Japan Record Award. As Mack-san says, the term enjo kōsai is remarkably precise, and it feels like a phrase coined by a generation that valued the beauty of traditional Japanese. The sound of it is also slightly reminiscent of folk songs. Papa-katsu is very much a product of today, for better or worse. For starters, the meaning is pretty sloppy. Shūkatsu means activities aimed at finding a job, right? Shūkatsu also means activities for preparing to reach the end of one’s life. So papa-katsu must mean activities aimed at becoming a papa. “I want to be a papa someday,” or “What if I suddenly become a papa? I’d better start preparing now.” That’s the mindset behind papa-katsu. Once you become a papa, your papa-katsu is over. Nobody keeps job-hunting after they’ve found a job, right? And if you were still doing end-of-life preparations after you’d already died, that would be seriously creepy. Go on and attain Buddhahood already. Even more baffling is the term papa-katsu women. Like, what exactly are you girls trying to do? Women engaging in activities to become papas…? “I may be receiving an allowance now, but someday I’ll be the one giving the allowance”—and maybe even changing sex in the process… What kind of grand ambition is that? I’m just meeting you because I want to fool around, but to think you were aiming for something like that all along—it’s so incredible that all I can feel is respect. I’m starting to lose track of what “papa” even means. After all, what we call papa-katsu isn’t actually “a papa’s activities.” It’s some tremendous entity we’ve never even laid eyes on. And both men and women are continuing their activities in pursuit of it. What is this, some kind of final boss? I’m getting scared! Anyway, it makes no sense, but it does have a nice ring to it. Papa-katsu has a string of punchy consonants, giving it the crisp, rhythmic sound of something like TikTok. As an aside, my father is 98 this year. His smartphone wasn’t working properly, so he asked me to take a look. While checking the settings, I discovered that TikTok was installed. I was so stunned that I couldn’t bring myself to question him about it, but it’s been nagging at me ever since. The thought that he might be uploading razor-sharp dance videos somewhere I can’t see them makes me feel strangely unsettled. So, Mack-san, I’ve given you a proper example to follow. Now do your best. Can you do it, can you do it, I wonder if you can—la la la ♪ (La la la ♪) Taro

When I hear “papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan),” the first thing that comes to mind is “papa sashimi.” But if I start imagining papa lying on a plate with his eyes bulging and his mouth opening and closing, it feels like something that would haunt my nightmares, so let’s stop there. As for “援助交際” (enjo kosai, compensated dating), it’s made up of “援助” (assistance) and “交際” (dating), so I think it’s actually a rather respectable-sounding term. It makes me think of China’s foreign aid initiative, the Belt and Road Initiative—the one that leaves developing countries saddled with enormous debts. By the way, did you know that the Japanese government’s ODA to China finally ended this March? I do wonder why it continued for so long, but just like compensated dating, beautiful-sounding words don’t necessarily mean the substance is beautiful too. That’s what you call adult circumstances. Compensated dating is the adult lower-body version of it, lol. “Shukatsu” means job hunting, but what is papa-katsu short for, I wonder? If it means “papa something-katsu,” I have no idea what the something is. What exactly are you doing with papa? ① His wallet ② His pe○is Well, saying that would rather ruin the joke. I’ve just realized that “wallet” is *pāsu*—a purse—so *pā○su* and pe○is… Hmm, written out like this, it’s not actually that funny. I can’t pull it off as nimbly as the original master, Unko Taro. If papa-katsu means “giving papa a jolt of life,” he’d probably need an AED. And if he’s taking ED medication, he may be excluded from reperfusion therapy, so it’s better to keep quiet about that. If papa-katsu means “activating papa,” then papa-katsu women are catalysts. And when you think of catalysts, you think of platinum—no wonder platinum women are so popular. A German scientist discovered back in the 19th century that blowing hydrogen onto platinum makes it react with oxygen in the air and ignite. But the first person to discover that getting a platinum woman to fire papa up can ignite both his brain and his pe○is, then spread to his p○urse as well and leave him badly burned, was probably someone on the early Universal Studios staff. That’s a story from the 21st genitals—sorry, 21st century. I checked the answer section after writing all this and the original Unko Taro still hasn’t posted yet. Good thing I made it in time.

I have almost no sense that I’m “dating” anyone. I’m simply acting as a papa (a male supporter), which is why I call it papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan). Around women, I don’t present myself as a “man”; I put the “papa” role front and center. I do that because, from experience, I know it makes women feel more at ease. My impression is that men involved in compensated dating tend to emphasize being a man. It feels like they’re paying to be treated as “a man.”

I’m Potassium, a female member. I think the difference comes down to how people feel about the relationship. So even among people doing papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan), there are probably some who see it the same way as enjo kōsai (transactional dating). To sum up how I see it: When you do a job you actually want to do and get paid, you can say, “Work is my hobby!” But when you do a job you don’t want to do and get paid, you say, “Work is labor!” (“I’m only doing it because I have to for the money.”) Isn’t it kind of like that? That’s just my personal opinion.

I’ve introduced women to men in the past, and one of those situations involved compensated dating, so I’ll describe a few different examples. Of course, I never received any referral fee. In every case: One was a large group mixer with around 30 people, which I also attended as the organizer. Another was a 3-on-3 trip arranged between a female classmate from high school and some male classmates from university. One of the pairs actually ended up getting married. Another involved an older acquaintance I mentioned in a previous answer. I arranged two double dates for him and accompanied them both times. He then dated the daughter of a temple priest for many years, and even after she married him and moved to a temple in Hokuriku, they continued sending me updates by email—and more recently, LINE. They even include messages of thanks to me. There was also a truck driver who was a friend of that older acquaintance. I introduced him to a woman around 20 who had a Ryo-like vibe and was looking for compensated dating. I simply gave the man her phone number, and I assume the two of them took it from there. In the first three cases, no money changed hands, and I was present when the women were introduced. They only continued seeing the people they liked, and some even ended up getting married. In the last case involving compensated dating, money would have been involved from the very first meeting. I only gave him her phone number and wasn’t there in person. I just introduced them because I thought their needs matched. Hmm? What exactly was that? I’ve always thought of it as compensated dating, but if it wasn’t with an unspecified number of people, does that make it papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan)? Which is it? Now I’m getting confused… Did I introduce them to papa-katsu?? What I can hardly imagine doing now is going on two long-distance dates to Yoshino and Mount Odaigahara just as someone’s companion. And even in the two examples above, I got no benefit at all from being the person who made the introduction. I guess seeing people happy was enough to make me feel satisfied. As for the group mixer, looking back, every man and woman there was connected to me somehow, so I can’t help wondering whether the time I spent attending it was a waste. That’s youth for you.

Universe Club coined the term “papa-katsu,” after all. As I understand it, papa-katsu means following the rules of the dating club if you register with one, or the rules of the website if you register there. “Enjo kōsai,” on the other hand, refers to individuals who aren’t affiliated with an escort service or similar establishment receiving money in exchange for sex. It’s an individual-to-individual arrangement conducted through dating sites or social media.

For a question like “Please tell me,” I think you’d be better off asking a researcher who specializes in Japanese linguistics. You want to know the meaning in Japanese, right? Besides, I don’t think there are any researchers specializing in Japanese linguistics here in the first place. If you want to know the meaning of a Japanese expression, I recommend asking an expert.

Papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) is more about genuinely becoming close, not just about the money. The latter uses the same kanji and means the same thing, but it’s a euphemistic term coined as a rebranding of individual prostitution. P.S. Mac-sensei is starting to sound like Taro Unko-sensei!

The people involved have different understandings. Also, I believe papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) originally referred to the act of looking for someone to date in exchange for an allowance.