It feels like they’re talking about me.
I still haven’t gotten a six-figure-yen allowance.
I agree with what Kazu said. Some women who identify as Type B or C are effectively Type A, so I first make sure they’re willing to accept someone nearly 30 years older and that they actually like me. If everything looks good, I move straight on to discussing money.
There’s no point talking about money with someone who isn’t willing to accept me. Of course, I’ll finalize the terms before we move to a room—or, with a Type B woman, before making plans for the next time.
Sorry for showing up late. I’ve read through all the answers, but did I do something to Paper Airplane-san? lol
The column on Univa that made me laugh the hardest was Paper Airplane-san’s. The first one in particular is brilliant.
From the opening line, “I finished singing ‘Pretender,’” I could barely hold back a chuckle. Then I burst out laughing at the middle section: “The chemistry between us has completely gone off the charts. It feels like it’s about to burst. For the third song, I chose Ozaki Yutaka’s ‘I LOVE YOU.’”
I laugh every time I read it.
Then I crack up all over again at:
“Then I sang the fourth song, ‘To My Beloved.’ When we reached the chorus—‘I’ll never let go of this hand, forever’—we clasped each other’s hands. More than the lyrics, I increasingly felt like I wanted to hold her close. I couldn’t hold myself back anymore.”
It’s a column overflowing with natural humor that the writer themselves probably doesn’t even realize. I really hope everyone gives it a read.
Even the table of contents is hilarious:
1. Let’s start with a kiss
2. I found a girl we really click with
3. Will the first date turn into a second one?
4. We hit it off the moment we met
5. I found a girl who responds incredibly well
For number 3, I want to say, “A first date is a first date, isn’t it? lol”
And for number 4: “What are you, Kenshiro? lol”
Maybe this kind of teasing is what scares people off, but Paper Airplane-san is absolutely packed with things to poke fun at. I think they’re a natural-born comic genius who has no idea how funny they are.
I’ve never been approached that way myself, so I’ll answer based on what I imagine.
If someone asked me the same thing, I’d check whether they’d be open to dating with an allowance. If they seemed receptive, I might casually bring it up then—why not give that a try?
From my experience, if you’re still thinking, “Hmm…” even with an allowance involved, it’s probably better not to pursue an adult relationship with that person.
If you come across a papa like that, I think it’s best to take it as a sign not to pursue an arrangement with him. You may occasionally find a good papa among them, but over time, you’ll probably start to get a feel for who’s who.
In my case, I don’t send out that many offers, and even outside the club I’m quite selective about whom I approach. Still, I always make my terms clear from the start.
That’s because I have this unfounded confidence that no one I’m interested in has ever found me instinctively off-putting（笑）. I may be mistaken sometimes, though, so I apologize if that’s the case.
Those are the rules, after all, and the club has explained them. Please give the club feedback so other female members won’t have to go through the same unpleasant experience.
As Ryo said, I know it may be difficult, but it might be best for the woman to have the courage to ask about the allowance if he doesn’t bring up the amount. If he still won’t say or you’re not satisfied with the terms, end the meeting there—it’ll probably be better for your peace of mind.
I recently came back from a break, so female member Potassium will answer.
I also think the mindset Ryo-san expressed—“Even if people think I’m all about money, this is a dating club, so you need to discuss things properly yourself and come to an agreement you’re comfortable with…”—is important.
No, seriously, those were exactly the words I wanted to say. You’re incredibly eloquent!
(Ryo-san, nice to meet you! I look forward to getting along with you m(_ _)m)
I mean, didn’t the club explain this too?
They tell you to discuss the allowance yourself, because otherwise it could lead to trouble...
If the other person hasn’t brought up the allowance, and you’re too worried that you’ll be seen as a “Kanegon” (I really love that word! Doesn’t it sound ridiculously cute? You’ve got great taste!) and that it’ll put you at a disadvantage, so you can’t negotiate—then, at that point, you’re already not a good fit.
I think that should also be one of the criteria for choosing a man.
Of course, I think it’s important to try to be humble. But not bringing up money yourself isn’t humility—it’s greedily trying to negotiate right up until the last possible moment. So I don’t think that’s something you should expect from the other person.
When a man thinks, “She probably feels awkward bringing this up,” and discusses it with you in advance, that consideration is part of his appeal, in a way.
You have to fulfill your own desires yourself...
You won’t get anywhere by relying on someone else.
Also, I don’t think money is considered a man’s appeal in this club. It’s simply an unspoken “prerequisite.”
※Everyone interprets what the allowance means differently, but since it’s a prerequisite, I think that’s why men offering no allowance get criticized.
Would you really see someone as incredibly attractive and immediately pursue an adult relationship just because he handed you a huge stack of cash?
Isn’t that basically the same as an ordinary job for making money? If it were a job, you’d need to be able to negotiate for yourself. Honestly, I think the person who asked this question is being far too half-hearted.
That said, papa-katsu isn’t a job. I think it’s something you’re meant to enjoy. (Negotiations included, of course.)
I see it as the one utopia you can freely create from scratch for yourself in the real world.
Since both sides are negotiating and feeling each other out, if you can’t steer the conversation toward what you want, that’s your own mistake and lack of skill.
And oh, right.
People talk about whether the amount is low or whatever, but if you’re relying on that allowance—which is supposedly your spending money or living expenses—to get by, then you’re not earning enough through regular work in the first place. So you can’t really complain that it’s low, can you?
Who do you think you are...? What are you, curry naan?
That’s how I see it, anyway. It’s just my personal opinion.
P.S.
So Kanegon came from Mac-san!
It has a cute sound and a meaning too—what a perfect word!
I’m going to use it as well.
Reading Maezawa-san’s follow-up helped me understand things even better.
Thank you!
I agree with Kazu as well—I first make sure there’s a biological attraction or not before discussing the terms. It’s only natural to confirm whether we can even sit down at the negotiating table before talking conditions. I also think it makes things easier for women if you create an opportunity to turn someone down at that stage.
If it depends on the allowance, you could say, in a lightly teasing way, “It depends on the allowance,” and get a quick laugh. Or say, “I started doing this because of certain circumstances, but I don’t really want to meet all kinds of people, so if you’re able to support me adequately…” There’s a way to phrase these things, you know. If you’re too blunt about it, you end up coming across as a cheap, money-obsessed girl.
There’s nothing wrong with prioritizing the allowance, but try to handle it skillfully. Basically, this is a game of gathering lots of people—including those who misunderstand things or don’t meet your terms—and filtering them out. It’s fine to cut people loose, but being too strict and rejecting someone with potential (what’s called a “correct rejection” in technical terms) would be a shame.
Taro
I pretty much feel the same way, lol.
> Maybe men who are weirdly overconfident don’t mention the allowance. More like, “Aren’t you lucky to have me as your papa?”
And then there’s the dreamer aspect:
> I suspect he’s just carrying some kind of middle-school phase—or a certain kind of youthful romanticism—into adulthood.
On the other hand, perhaps I’m unusually good at judging people, or maybe I’m simply overconfident. Ever since becoming an adult, whenever I’ve fallen for someone and thought, “This could work,” I’ve properly dated every one of them outside the club as a romantic partner. Things progressed further, we all got engaged, got married, and even after broken engagements or divorces, we’ve continued to maintain good relationships to this day—as long as we weren’t still married.
So when I meet someone at the club who gives me that same instant feeling, I simply do the same thing. I believe that my ability to judge people applies to the club as well.
At the club, of course, the basic premise is that an adult relationship (intimate) and an allowance come first. On top of that, each person places different weight on intimacy, dating, romance, the relationship itself, and the sense of fulfillment money provides.
What makes the club so special is that, in addition to the basic premise, physical compatibility is also a foundation, and you can build all those other things on top of it.
In my case, I place a lot of importance on dating and the relationship itself. I think both sides eventually develop some kind of connection that allows them to stay in each other’s lives indefinitely.
When people ask how long my relationships have lasted on average, the answer is over 20 years. So perhaps my judgment isn’t entirely off, and if things continue this way, “forever” may actually be true. I don’t think either side gets tired of the other or grows tired of being together. I’ve always been told I’m the kind of person who gets better the more you get to know me, so maybe I become more appealing over time…
If the women weren’t happy with it, they would have left long ago. This is simply one of my characteristics. Everyone has their strengths and weaknesses, and I think you can reach the other person only by approaching them in the style that suits you best.
So generally speaking, I agree that it’s smart and classy to discuss the allowance and promptly hand over the mutually agreed amount. In fact, I think that’s the better way to do things.
Some men may not be comfortable with that process. Some may feel it’s like forcing something to grow unnaturally, while others may not be able to regard it as dating at all.
Still, as a way for both people to feel fulfilled and build a better relationship, I think it’s perfectly valid to use whatever approach plays to your individual strengths.
That said, you shouldn’t do this unless you have tremendous confidence in your ability to judge people—or, rather, an almost perfect track record.
In my case, as I mentioned a little while ago, there was a 19-year-old ronin student who looked like Ryoko Hirosue at a show pub. I simply said to her inside the club, “We’re going the same way, so I’ll walk you home,” and she was waiting for me outside when I left.
Back when I used to attend matchmaking parties, I would say to the most popular girl, “Let’s go get something to eat after this.” No matter how many men approached her after the party, she would always go eat with me.
Being able to give someone a sense of security and trust with just one sentence is probably essential. I think that comes through in my expression, way of speaking, and tone—things I’ve developed through inviting dozens of women out over the years.
So, what I’m trying to say is this:
If you go on a date with your absolute favorite, keep seeing her, naturally progress to an adult relationship (intimate), and continue dating closely for a long time without money ever becoming an issue, there’s nothing more enjoyable than that.
In my experience, it’s completely different from being with someone where the allowance was explicitly discussed.
Women outside the club don’t receive something called an allowance, but even in a romantic relationship, there are times when you express your feelings by giving money. The sense of fulfillment is similar to that, but it’s hard to put into words.
I believe you can continue the relationship and keep experiencing the same joy you would with a woman outside the club.
I’m writing this simply to say that there are papas like that as well.
> Make-Otoko,
Thank you. Comments are always welcome. The only person whose comments scare me is Flag Maker, lol.
Feel free to join in anytime, Flag Maker…
I think it’s fine for Make-Otoko and everyone else to have their own styles.
If this were a competition, I might start feeling a little competitive and wonder if I was losing only when Make-Otoko no longer wanted to make a single offer, had reduced his monthly arrangements to just one woman, and was seeing her almost every day.
Right now, our types, playing fields, and ideals are completely different.
Some people want ten monthly arrangements. Others don’t consider that dating and prefer to date only one or two people.
Some people don’t consider papa-katsu conducted with polite speech to be dating, while others prefer it that way.
Some people feel fulfilled by the power of money, while others feel empty.
Everyone is different.
If the women we’re currently dating knew the truth, which one would they choose?
On one side, there’s the papa who offers a monthly arrangement with an overwhelmingly large allowance, only needs to meet once a month or so, and still pays even if they can’t meet that month—but has many other monthly partners and will ruthlessly cut them off whenever they get too full of themselves.
On the other side, there’s the papa who is pay-per-meeting, but has only one absolute favorite. He can confidently let things progress, has built a sense of security and a relationship that feels eternal, can see her as often as he wants—more than ten times a month if they like—and has lost all desire to make offers to anyone else.
Which one would be better?
Personally, the moment we have to use polite speech, I no longer feel like it’s papa-katsu, so I think our types and overall atmosphere are probably different too.
Generally speaking, you do need to start with an arrangement that includes an allowance.
But if that becomes the unquestioned norm, it gets boring.
There’s no single correct answer when it comes to relationships between men and women. Even when there are rules, the feelings of both people remain involved.
Make-Otoko, I’m currently dating my absolute favorite girl from the club in exactly this way. We’re still actively, passionately in love, and I’m right in the middle of the happiness of not needing to make any more offers. Isn’t that what you make offers for in the first place?
Rather, I’d like to hear that Make-Otoko has reached such a premium, black-card level that he no longer needs to make offers—or that, regardless of whether he has, he’s found one irreplaceable woman who fulfills him completely.
At the moment, you have many monthly partners tied to you by contracts, but no true favorite or woman you’re head-over-heels for. If I were in your position, I think I’d feel lonely—or maybe empty.
But we’re looking for different things.
Still, there’s one thing I can say for sure:
When you’re happy and fulfilled, you don’t need to make offers.
To share a little more of my honest feelings:
I hope there will be more happy men and women, and more fulfilling relationships, where neither side needs to make offers or accept them anymore.
I’m writing this in hopes that it may offer someone a hint.
I’ve benefited so much from the club that I feel it’s worth answering even if it meant both respondents and members were immediately kicked out for violating the rules. The more my views differ from everyone else’s, the more I feel there must be many things I couldn’t write while I was still in a position where I needed to make offers.
From the bottom of my heart, I’m grateful—and I sincerely hope that more encounters and relationships like mine will come to exist through the club.
That sounds really tough.
I’m not good at being pressured during the first dinner, so I usually choose Type B. With Type B, I feel like there are fewer stingy papas (male supporters).
Anyway, if you’re using something like Type C, where you have to negotiate from the first meeting, when the subject of going to a private room comes up, you could smile and say something like, “I’m happy… I’m getting nervous,” then excuse yourself to use the restroom or something (so you don’t bring up money right away). When you come back, you could ask vaguely:
“Um… by the way, I’m worried this might be rude to ask, but would I receive an allowance for something like that?”
If the amount is way too low, you could say, “I see… I was hoping for around [this amount]. I’m really sorry,” then apologize and leave.
Any man who reacts badly to that isn’t worth your time. How much consideration are you expected to show, anyway? That sounds really rough…
I feel the same way as Kazu.
Until now—and going forward, too—I’ve been presenting my terms and letting them decide whether they’re acceptable or not. But deep down, I do kind of want to follow that up with, “Okay, then… how about around this much?”
That said, I’d rather be valued for who I am, not just for the amount of money.
I know, I know—it’s a package deal, right? lol
Because men are the ones paying, they may feel that puts them in a superior position. That’s probably why they think that if they sleep with a woman without discussing the amount beforehand, they can sort everything out afterward. (Even if the amount is low, they assume the woman will have no choice but to accept it.)
But the two parties are on equal footing. If a woman says she was raped, can the man produce evidence proving that he didn’t rape her?
When you think about it that way, there’s also an argument that the man is actually in the weaker position. If he offers a low allowance after they’ve been intimate and the woman becomes genuinely furious, things could escalate into a major incident.
Even if he assumes he won’t ultimately be indicted—and even if he isn’t—creating a huge commotion could still cause serious social damage.
For example, as the man is trying to leave, she could grab his clothes, burst into tears, and loudly shout, “This man is a rapist! Arrest him!” People with a strong sense of justice might restrain him, call the police, record and upload videos, or even get the story picked up by a news site.
Men really should stop underestimating women.
That said, in the questioner’s case, it seems enough to simply decline once the man refuses to state the amount. If the other person is being vague or unreliable, just leave after the meal. That should be all you need to do.
P.S. Kanegon…
Kanegon is said to be the most famous monster appearing in *Ultra Q*. He eats banknotes and coins as his staple diet and will die if he stops eating.
His staple food is coins and paper money, and he needs ¥3,520 per day. The amount of money inside his body is displayed on the counter of the cash register on his left chest. If it reaches zero, he dies, so he keeps eating money. Eventually, after fleeing from friends who had run out of money giving it to Kanegon—though they were pretty greedy themselves—he ends up eating money from a bank.
That’s what it says.
Apparently, there’s a statue of Kanegon at the Ultra-Man Shopping Street near Soshigaya-Okura Station in Tokyo.
I think the order should be to first find out whether you’re physically attracted to each other, before discussing the allowance.
If you both say it’s a yes, then you can move on to discussing the allowance.
Papas who don’t mention the allowance or say they’ll pay afterward are 99.9% pay-per-meeting 50,000 yen or less. That’s genuinely the truth.
Also, maybe papas who are weirdly overconfident don’t mention the allowance. You know, the “Aren’t you lucky to have me as your papa?” type. A textbook person to avoid.
papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) is about mutually agreeing on the rules and enjoying yourselves within those boundaries. Trying to start things without deciding on any terms means they’ve already got flowers blooming in their head. The questioner is completely right, and they’re not being money-minded at all.
Actually, I genuinely don’t understand what’s wrong with women caring about money. A papa who calls a woman money-minded for starting papa-katsu because she’s struggling financially is far more money-minded himself. Honestly, they’re out of their minds.
> Paper Airplane
If it’s outside the club, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that approach, and I’m similar myself. When meeting someone outside the club, I talk about money after things get intimate.
But because you said you approach Universe’s Type B women with the same stance as when meeting someone outside the club, I think it could encourage some misguided idiots and end up raising questions about your qualifications as an answerer (I’m deliberately using the wrong kanji here).
More idiots will start copying that approach, won’t they? The women who suffer as a result are the club’s female members. Though, of course, I’m probably the last person you’d want to hear that from, haha.
Anyway, get back in the game and keep winning over Premium Black ladies in Type B for 50,000 yen pay-per-meeting. I’m sure there are countless male members who’d love to hear those stories based on what’s happening now. I’d love to hear them too, of course. I want to hear about what’s happening now, not stories from the past ♡
By the way, I distinguish between:
・Premium Black ladies
・Premiere Black ladies
Just because someone has “premium” in the title doesn’t mean they’re actually amazing. I want you to keep winning over the truly premium Black ladies for 50,000 yen pay-per-meeting and boast, “How about that, you losers? ♡”
I want a rival I can compete with head-on as a hunter♪
And this kind of interaction between answerers is exactly what the question box fans enjoy most, so let’s give them what they’re hoping for ♡
Anyway, off to work out!
I’m Ryo, a female respondent.
I’ve had a similar experience myself. I wasn’t allowed to discuss the allowance, and everything came down to whether I was willing to have an adult relationship (intimate). He pressured me by saying, “I’ll pay you properly afterward. I never said I wasn’t going to pay, did I?”
In the end, I did receive the amount I’d hoped for, but he initially offered an unbelievably low allowance. I was deeply shocked, and I also regretted going along with him without being able to properly discuss things myself. I realized that I was partly to blame.
Even if people think you’re being too focused on money, this is a dating club, so I believe it’s much better to discuss everything clearly yourself and only move on to an adult relationship (intimate) once you’ve decided that you’re comfortable with the terms of the arrangement.
There’s no need to get hurt for nothing. I hope you find a wonderful papa (a male supporter) who’s willing to communicate with you properly.
