A papa who gives me an allowance even in months we don't meet.
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We've known each other for about eight months, and my papa still gives me an allowance in months when we can't meet because of his work.
Even though the reason we can't meet is work-related, I feel uncomfortable receiving an allowance when we haven't met even once...
The reason is that, from what I see here, a monthly arrangement seems to be around 30–50, but the amount he gives me is even more than that.
There are so many other nice girls out there, so what could this papa be thinking?
Whenever I receive my allowance, I end up acting apologetic.
From what I see here, I guess I should accept it with a smile, and I really am incredibly grateful and happy to receive the full amount for a monthly arrangement! But I just can't express it honestly...
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂20s👑Universe female member
So you’re comfortable accepting around 30,000–50,000 yen, but feel hesitant about receiving more than that, right?
Why not try accepting just 50,000 yen?
Everyone answering has different opinions, so ultimately, only that papa (a male supporter) knows how he really feels.
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Oh! Is this your entry for the “subtlety championship”?
It’s a textbook example of a post like this!
But since it follows on from your previous question, let’s switch things up a bit, lol.
That papa (a male supporter) certainly has guts! I’d say he’s an ideal papa. And it got me imagining an even more extreme version of that kind of generosity.
A papa who genuinely expects nothing in return!
The monthly allowance would still be transferred every month, but no matter how hard you tried, you could never meet him, lol. Since he expects nothing in return, you’d never see him again for the rest of your life. But the payments would continue until he died.
A papa who no longer needs your smile or even your gratitude, lol.
What do you think? A papa like that, lol?
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When I was in my thirties, I had a monthly arrangement with a woman and gave her an allowance even when we didn’t meet. I kept it going mostly out of inertia, but I stopped seeing her because I didn’t find our time together particularly enjoyable. After a few months, I told her I wanted to end things.
Based on that experience, I suspect this man is giving you an allowance simply because a promise is a promise.
Unless something happens to break out of this rut, he’ll probably eventually ask to end the arrangement. Whether or not it gets terminated probably has little to do with whether you accept the allowance—or your attitude when you do.
For the arrangement to continue, I think it’s important to keep providing the man with a certain amount of excitement.
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I’m busy seeing other girls, but I don’t want to cut things off. In fact, not seeing each other makes me less likely to end things or break up, so the relationship can continue.
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It’s all about the stage you’re at.
① Pay-per-meeting: ¥50,000 or less → 1st stage
② Pay-per-meeting: ¥60,000 or more → 2nd stage
③ Getting frustrated when you don’t meet the agreed number of times under a monthly arrangement → 3rd stage
④ Giving her money even when you don’t meet under a monthly arrangement → 4th stage
The minimum for a monthly arrangement is ¥300,000 or more.
The papa of the person asking this question is probably at the 4th stage.
Once a papa gets used to the 4th stage, giving a girl money even when they don’t meet starts to feel good. It’s like, “I’m so cool. Such a gentleman.” I understand it well because I’m at this stage myself right now.
The final stage, the 5th stage, is when a papa doesn’t even think, “I’m so cool for giving money to a girl I don’t meet.” Instead, he genuinely thinks:
“Huh? It’s a monthly arrangement, so whether we meet or not is irrelevant, right?”
I’m currently training to reach the 5th stage myself.
As Seattle-san pointed out, once you reach the 4th stage, you become incredibly popular. That’s because, from a woman’s perspective, the way you spend your money comes across as classy.
You’ll meet more women outside dating clubs, and you’ll be able to enjoy papa-katsu (compensated dating in Japan) with gorgeous women you’d never even see at a dating club.
On the other hand, if either men or women try to operate at a stage beyond their means, papa-katsu—which should be fun—can end up causing them a lot of stress instead.
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If she’s a genuinely good woman, it’s only natural to give her an allowance even when you don’t meet.
Supporters like that are popular, so be careful not to lose him.
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Isn’t that what a monthly arrangement is supposed to be?
In the question below, the woman’s attitude probably isn’t great either, and I also thought the allowance was low for a monthly arrangement.
You’re attractive just as you are, and I think your papa (a male supporter) likes you that way. He’s chosen a monthly arrangement and is happy to give you an allowance even without meeting, so I don’t think you need to change based on other people’s opinions.
No one else can know what your papa is thinking, but I believe he likes you just the way you are now.
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