I’m sorry for being so inexperienced and obviously a beginner. Third time’s the charm. (･_･;
Thank you to everyone who responded to my two previous posts!（ ｉ _ ｉ ）
You really helped me. Your kindness touched me deeply ♡（ ; ; ）
Now, onto my actual question:
I’m asking about the “That’s lovely” feature.
Do the women here use it?
If so, how often, and what kind of messages do you send?
I’d really appreciate it if you could tell me, to whatever extent you’re comfortable sharing. ( ´ ▽ ` )
And for the men here, do you feel happy when a woman sends you a “That’s lovely”?
Honestly, do you ever find it annoying or feel like she’s just trying to flatter you? (･_･;
If you’ve ever sent or received a “That’s lovely” and it led to a monthly arrangement, or if you have any experiences or opinions to share, I’d love to hear them! ( ´ ▽ ` )
Of course, I’m grateful when a papa (a male supporter) sends me an offer, but I also feel this could be one way to find someone I’m interested in myself…
However, I keep overthinking that the other person might see me as a pushy girl, so I haven’t been able to use it.（ ; ; ）
I’d really love to hear what everyone thinks.
Thank you in advance. (＞人＜;)
👤Asked byGuest👩GenderFemale🎂20s👑Universe female member
If you’re getting comments that aren’t just the usual canned responses, you might be interested.
I’m thinking of making my profile public again after a long time. I already have a monthly arrangement, but I’m open to letter-date offers.
I’ll write “Profile: Respondent Seattle.” Looking forward to hearing from you.
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> Do women use it?
Some do, yes.
> And what kind of messages do they send?
I thought most people would just send the same message, but apparently some actually read the profile carefully and send heartfelt messages.
That said, it’s difficult to write a heartfelt message when the man’s profile doesn’t say much.
I think women are more likely to write thoughtful messages when men also take the time to write proper profiles.
Oh, but it seems some people do send the same message every time. Given how the system works, I suppose that can’t really be helped.
If this were a dating app, I think men would be doing the same thing even if women didn’t do anything.
> I’m thinking it might be one way to find someone wonderful on my own.
I think that’s exactly right.
Men want to choose for themselves, so it doesn’t often lead to an offer. But if a woman they happen to have overlooked in the listings sends them a “You seem wonderful” message, they may think, “Huh? How did I miss her?” and then make an offer.
The odds of it leading to an offer are low at the moment, but I think the important thing is that it gets men to look at your profile.
> Is it still possible to leave a “You seem wonderful” comment?
It was displayed below the password entry field when men logged in. I thought displaying it for a month would be enough, but I’ll extend it for another month...
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Like Marika, I’m registered under the secret option, but I’m currently taking a break, so I haven’t actually used it. Sorry.
That said, if I were to use it, I might not bother if I didn’t get any responses from potential matches—it would be disappointing.
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I think it works really well when you actually read someone’s hobbies and the kind of dates they enjoy before sending a “Sounds wonderful” like.
Not only does it show that you’re active, but when your date preferences line up perfectly, the chances of continuing are much higher.
It’s really important that both people feel comfortable with the kind of dates they’ll have. Being able to choose those preferences in advance is a real advantage. It looks like you’ve found yourself a monthly arrangement. When your date preferences match, things are easy, exciting, and fun. (For example, some people say it’s awful to make the woman choose the restaurant, but if you’re both foodies, there are so many places you want to try that choosing one together is part of the fun.)
I also feel that comments might not really mean much if they’re just copied and pasted.
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Men like me who don’t want to receive messages probably keep their profiles private.
Those who make their profiles public are generally doing so to receive “You seem nice,” so I think you should feel free to send one.
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I’ve never used “Sounds Wonderful!” because men can’t see it when I’m in Secret or on a break from the site—even after comments became available.
But if I were to use it, I’d read the person’s profile carefully, send “Sounds Wonderful!” to someone who seems to share my interests, and explain that in the comment.
Now that comments are available, I feel like you can clarify there that you’re not just clicking it indiscriminately or trying to flatter people, so it seems like a good feature.
I haven’t tried it yet, though, so I can’t say how effective it is. Sorry.
Marika
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